


Priorities

by violettflower



Category: Pentagon (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, I'm not sure where this story is going to go haha, M/M, Possibly Unrequited Love, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2019-04-29 13:23:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 26,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14473653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violettflower/pseuds/violettflower
Summary: Yuto has always chosen friendship over anything, even love. So what should he do when his friend becomes his love?





	1. Feelings are stupid

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing fanfiction so please excuse any mistakes that I make. I'm also not sure where this story will go, as well as whether it will have a happy ending or not. There is also most likely going to be some angst so you have been warned! Otherwise please enjoy and I would really appreciate any comments to see how you guys feel about this story. Also please support Pentagon woo!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuto is an emotional mess and he doesn't know what to do about it

When did it begin? How did he start to feel like this?

There was panic stuck in his throat. Yuto tried to swallow it down, but he could still feel it suffocate him. Instead, he focused on steadying his breathing. ‘Calm down,’ Yuto told himself, despite the fact that he could feel his pulse beat faster in the hand that was being clasped. He didn’t know if Kino could tell, but his palms felt damper than they did ten seconds ago. If not, Yuto was pretty sure that he didn’t want him to find out why.

“Yuto? Are you listening to what I’m saying?” He blinked as a massive hand was shaken right in front of his face. Yuto looked over to see it belonged to Wooseok, his best friend and roommate. His doe-like eyes were drilling right into him, and he looked annoyed. Yuto would be concerned if Wooseok didn’t wear the same expression 90% of the time anyway. Besides, he was only irritated because he was hungry and an empty stomach was Wooseok’s worst enemy.

“Yeah I am,” Yuto muttered. He still couldn’t ignore the fingers that were currently entwined in his own. Was his hand starting to tingle because it was being held so tightly or something else? His hand was still sweating, if not more. He had to do something about this situation before it got more difficult.

“Are you annoyed because I refuse to eat hamburgers again? We’ve already had that for the past three days, but if you really want to, then we can have it for dinner again. Let’s just at least get something to eat. I’m starving,” Wooseok grumbled as he took his wallet out of his jean pocket.

“Just because you can’t stand being hungry doesn’t mean we have to follow your eating schedule all the time Wooseok,” Kino tsked at his friend, then focused his round eyes on Yuto. Were his eyes always this shade of warm brown? “But really Yuto, are you okay? Something seems to be bothering you.”

This was the problem with having two friends of 7 years. Even if you didn’t say anything, they knew when something was up. What was he going to do with himself?

“I’m fine. I just don’t feel like eating right now. Actually,” Yuto gently pulled his hand out of Kino’s hand, “ I just realized that I need to go to the library to get a textbook out for our assignment.”

“What! Adachi Yuto, you said we would go out to eat just ten minutes ago!” Wooseok growled, punching Yuto lightly in the stomach. “We’ve only been waiting here because Kino’s lecture finished late and now you decide to ditch us?”

“Just eat without me, I really should do some work on that assignment. You know I haven’t started it, and it’s due by the end of this week.” Yuto complained. He realised that Kino was still frowning at him, with the same frown he'd seen many times over the years. Overall, Kino looked the same as any other day. Maybe a bit funnier than usual because parts of his hair were sticking up oddly, probably from the way he slept. However, that didn't explain why his pulse was still beating faster than usual when he stared at Kino, or when their fingers brushed against each other. Maybe he was just overthinking things, and this physiological reaction was caused by something else. Was it the coffee from six hours ago? Could caffeine even be effective after that time?

“Whatever man, I’ll let you off because Kino is here. You know I hate eating alone,” Wooseok grumbled, getting up to pull Kino. “Come on, let’s go eat.”

Kino was still staring at Yuto. Why couldn’t he just leave? Yuto hoped that his tan skin tone would conceal the fact that his cheeks were starting to warm. Kino began to bite the corner of his lip, and now Yuto wanted nothing else except to run away and scream out his confusion.

“Are you really going to go to the library?” Kino asked him cautiously. If Yuto was correct, Kino was suspicious of him. Which was fair enough, because Yuto never went to the library after lectures were over. Also, he never started on his assignments until two days before the deadline. That was a definite reason to be wary of his actions.

“Let him be Kino; he might as well get a head start for once. I’m surprised by how he’s survived the past two years like this. I guess if he weren’t a smart ass then he would have dropped out.” Wooseok continued to pull at Kino’s arm. “Please, can we go eat. Otherwise, I might start getting seriously grumpy for once.”

Kino rolled his eyes. “Okay Wooseok, we can go now or else you’ll be complaining the whole time. We’ll catch you later Yuto, good luck on that assignment.” Kino dropped the strange look he was giving Yuto and cheerfully waved at him, then followed Wooseok down the street. Yuto watched Kino and Wooseok until they disappeared off the street and then closed his eyes.

“You’re acting stupid,” Yuto muttered softly to himself, before picking up his bag and walking back to his university. If he'd made the effort to ditch his friends for the library, he might as well get some actual work done.


	2. A walk down memory lane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On his way back home, Yuto thinks about the past.

Four hours later, Yuto got pretty much at least a third of his assignment completed. He was pretty surprised by how productive he'd been by working at the library. Perhaps it was because by focusing on reading articles and textbooks, he was able to ignore the burning question that he knew he would have to answer soon. 'Maybe for the next few days' Yuto thought in amusement, 'I should go to the library after classes to do some work for once.' Also, it would give him some alone time until he could sort out what his problem was. It was 8 pm now so he decided he should head back to his flat before it got too late. He packed up his belongings and headed out of the library, where a slight breeze greeted him. It was just cold enough to make the hairs on his arms stand. As winter was coming closer, there had been a noticeable change in the weather and scenery. Gone were the variety of colourful flowers, and even most of the leaves were stripped off the trees. As he walked, he rubbed his hands for some heat and then stared down at them, allowing the memory of today’s events to arise in his mind finally.

\------------

Yuto, Wooseok, and Kino had been friends since he was 13 years old. Arriving in a foreign country for the first time, he remembered feeling afraid and lost without his family, particularly his older brother. His mother wanted him to have experience living in another country while he was younger so Wooseok’s mother, a good friend of Yuto’s mother, offered to let Yuto stay at their home for a couple of years. His first judgment of Wooseok’s mother was that she was a kind, gentle woman. Yuto instantly took a liking to her, as she reminded him of his own mother. It was the opposite for Wooseok, who had the same aggressive frown and dark eyes as he did now. The only resemblance Wooseok and his mother had with each other was their tall, lean, deer-like frame and jet black hair which sharply contrasted with their pale skin. On Yuto’s first day at Wooseok’s home, they had not spoken a word to each other except some grunts and nods. Actually, he had not even heard Wooseok talk since he arrived. That night, Yuto had never felt so lonely as he lay in the unfamiliar blankets and stiff mattress.

The next day, Wooseok’s mother had already packed them both lunch (which was a surprise to Yuto, because Yuto’s mother always woke up later than Yuto and gave him money to buy food) and instructed Wooseok to walk with Yuto to school.

“Be nice Wooseok; it's Yuto’s first day at school here. How come you're so quiet today? I thought you'd be thrilled to have Yuto here. You’re always complaining about how you don’t have a brother,” Wooseok’s mother ruffled her son’s hair, who was staring down at the ground.

Yuto’s stomach felt clenched the moment they walked out of the house. He prayed that the walk to the school wasn’t too far. They walked side by side, in silence, for the whole fifteen minutes. The only sounds that came from them were the squeaks from Yuto’s brand new shoes against the concrete and Wooseok occasionally clearing his throat. Yuto could sense Wooseok steal glances at him, but he was too scared to look back at him. From what he heard from his mother, Wooseok had been ecstatic when he learned that Yuto was going to stay at their home, but maybe there had been a misunderstanding. He didn’t blame Wooseok, because he was basically a stranger taking up half the space in his room. Yuto couldn’t even speak much Korean yet, apart from the basics he had learned with his mother. Now, he secretly wished to himself that he wouldn’t have to stay too long at Wooseok’s home.

“We’re here,” Wooseok suddenly spoke in a rough voice, nodding his head to the block of buildings to his left. Yuto was caught off-guard by the sudden Japanese he'd spoken to him but continued to follow him in silence. The school buildings looked similar to those of his previous school back in Japan; only the hallways were filled with incomprehensive yells and chatter. Yuto was reminded of his own school in Japan, and once again he felt alone.

“Wookseok-ah, you’re here!” Out of nowhere, a smaller boy jumped onto Wooseok, who grunted in surprise. The boy's wide eyes looked as if they were beaming and he had high cheekbones that looked even fuller as he smiled from ear to ear. His straight black hair was too long for him, past his eyebrows and almost stabbing his eyes, and made him look even younger next to Wooseok. Yuto had never seen someone look so happy to greet another person and he was surprised to see Wooseok smile for the first time since he had met him. Wooseok muttered something in Korean to the boy, which made him lean back and laugh out loud. The boy then turned to look at Yuto and once again he was blown away by the bright aura of this boy. Although he was smaller than both Yuto and Wooseok, his presence seemed to fill the area around them. He suddenly grabbed both of Yuto’s hands and shook them while continuing to smile brightly. In a slow, but crisp voice, the boy spoke in Japanese. “Hello, I’ve heard so much about you from Wooseok. I’m Kino, Wooseok’s best friend. I’m so glad to have met you! Let’s become close friends too.”

Yuto stared down at the boy, Kino, and couldn’t help but smile back. “Hello, my name is Yuto. Thank you for welcoming me. Your Japanese is very good.”

“Thank you. When Wooseok heard that you were coming to live with him, he asked his mother to teach him Japanese. So, I’ve been learning with him too. Wooseok’s much better than me though.” Kino let go of Yuto’s hands and pulled Wooseok’s arm. Wooseok was staring at the ground again, and Yuto noticed that the tip of his ears was pink. “Wooseok-ah, why aren’t you saying anything? You're acting weird.”

“Shut up,” Wooseok mumbled. Kino stared at his friend and then began to laugh loudly again, clapping his hands to his face. “Don’t laugh at me!” Wooseok grumbled, pushing Kino away from him. Kino covered his mouth, but Yuto could still hear giggles creep out from him.

“Don’t mind him Yuto; he’s just feeling very shy right now. All he’s been talking about since last week was you, and he’s just being… what do you call it? Ah, tsundere?” Kino laughed until Wooseok glared at him. Finally, Wooseok looked at Yuto.

“I’m not a tsundere. I just… find it hard to talk to strangers,” Wooseok told him, his ears still flushing. Now that Yuto looked at him, he looked a lot more gentle. Maybe it helped that Kino was linking arms with him, and grinning at Wooseok.

“It’s okay. It’s kind of cute?” Yuto found himself saying. Kino stared at Yuto, mouth slightly opened, and then roared with laughter. Yuto found himself being punched by Wooseok while Kino stood in front of Yuto, his arms stretched out as if he was a human shield.

“Come on guys, class is about to start,” Kino grabbed both Wooseok and Yuto’s sleeves, and Yuto found himself being pulled by Kino, who was surprisingly strong for his size.

For the rest of the year, Yuto was placed between Kino and Wooseok in class. Almost every day, Kino would come over to their house, and the three of them would attempt to do their homework together, or goof off and watch One Piece or play video games. Yuto quickly learned more about Wooseok and Kino. Beneath Wooseok’s hard exterior was a much softer boy who became embarrassed and shy quickly. Later on, Yuto discovered that the reason why Wooseok hadn’t spoken to Yuto first was that according to Wooseok, Yuto appeared much more mature than he’d expected, which made him nervous about approaching him. Meanwhile, Kino was very different from Wooseok. He was a positive-minded boy who was surprisingly very mature and well-spoken. At times he could be serious, such as when he was concentrating on a task. He could also be stubborn, especially when he felt passionate about something. However, he always spoke in a polite and friendly manner to anyone. Out of all the people Yuto knew, Kino laughed out loud the most, and he wasn’t afraid to show his affection for others, such as hugging Wooseok or clinging onto Yuto’s arms. According to Wooseok, the two of them had been friends since primary school when Kino had offered to be his partner for a project. This was when Wooseok had no friends, which was probably because his appearance was intimidating even as a child.

The three of them stayed together throughout high school, even though they had very different characteristics. As they got older, Kino became the class president and was involved in the student council, orchestra, and volunteering clubs. Easily, he was the most popular out of the three and loved by both boys and girls at their school. On the other hand, Wooseok preferred to be alone, only choosing to hang out with a selected group of people from his rock band. Most days he was in class sleeping, usually from staying up to watch anime. For Yuto, who had quickly learned to speak fluent Korean from both Kino and Wooseok, he spent most of his high school experience in the baseball club. However, the three of them spent lunchtimes together when they could and whenever Yuto didn’t have baseball practice, Kino had no student council duties and Wooseok was free from playing in his band, the three of them would walk home together. So although Yuto missed his family, after the first year at Wooseok’s, he realised that he wasn’t lonely anymore because he had a family here. When they finished high school, they all got accepted into the same university, even Yuto who had been afraid that he was going to fail his exams. Kino had chosen to study law, following his father’s footsteps, while both Yuto and Wooseok were studying engineering. While Kino was studying a different degree and living in one of the dorms provided by the university for scholarship students, occasionally he still came over to the flat which Yuto and Wooseok were sharing. The three of them were still the same, and nothing had really changed since high school.

“I’m fine. I just don’t feel like eating right now. Actually,” Yuto gently pulled his hand out of Kino’s hand, “ I just realized that I need to go to the library to get a textbook out for our assignment.”

“What! Adachi Yuto, you said we would go out to eat just ten minutes ago!” Wooseok growled, punching Yuto lightly in the stomach. “We’ve only been waiting here because Kino’s lecture finished late and now you decide to ditch us?”

“Just eat without me, I really should do some work on that assignment. You know I haven’t started it, and it’s due by the end of this week.” Yuto complained. He realised that Kino was still frowning at him, with the same frown he'd seen many times over the years. Overall, Kino looked the same as any other day. Maybe a bit funnier than usual because parts of his hair were sticking up oddly, probably from the way he slept. However, that didn't explain why his pulse was still beating faster than usual when he stared at Kino, or when their fingers brushed against each other. Maybe he was just overthinking things, and this physiological reaction was caused by something else. Was it the coffee from six hours ago? Could caffeine even be effective after that time?

“Whatever man, I’ll let you off because Kino is here. You know I hate eating alone,” Wooseok grumbled, getting up to pull Kino. “Come on, let’s go eat.”

Kino was still staring at Yuto. Why couldn’t he just leave? Yuto hoped that his tan skin tone would conceal the fact that his cheeks were starting to warm. Kino began to bite the corner of his lip, and now Yuto wanted nothing else except to run away and scream out his confusion.

“Are you really going to go to the library?” Kino asked him cautiously. If Yuto was correct, Kino was suspicious of him. Which was fair enough, because Yuto never went to the library after lectures were over. Also, he never started on his assignments until two days before the deadline. That was a definite reason to be wary of his actions.

“Let him be Kino; he might as well get a head start for once. I’m surprised by how he’s survived the past two years like this. I guess if he weren’t a smart ass then he would have dropped out.” Wooseok continued to pull at Kino’s arm. “Please, can we go eat. Otherwise, I might start getting seriously grumpy for once.”

Kino rolled his eyes. “Okay Wooseok, we can go now or else you’ll be complaining the whole time. We’ll catch you later Yuto, good luck on that assignment.” Kino dropped the strange look he was giving Yuto and cheerfully waved at him, then followed Wooseok down the street. Yuto watched Kino and Wooseok until they disappeared off the street and then closed his eyes.

“You’re acting stupid,” Yuto muttered softly to himself, before picking up his bag and walking back to his university. If he'd made the effort to ditch his friends for the library, he might as well get some actual work done.


	3. Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When everything seems like normal, until it isn't. Or, the moment when Yuto realised that his best friend was kind of hot.

Or maybe something had changed? Kino’s laughing face flashed in front of him, and Yuto squeezed his eyes together. Kino was his friend, his other brother. Someone he adored, who he owed so many thanks. He still felt that way towards him; he was sure about that. Yet he couldn’t deny that there was something else he felt when he saw Kino now, ever since last weekend.

That night, the three of them had decided to grab a drink together to celebrate the end of the semester. Typically, it was Wooseok and Yuto who were out of it by the end of their nights and Kino would be the one to carry the two of them into the taxi and back home, get them changed and ready for bed. However, that night Kino had unexpectedly drunk more alcohol than he usually did, and he continued to drink even after Wooseok had fallen asleep. Luckily Yuto had decided not to drink too much as he was still recovering from a bad cold, or else they probably would have never gotten back home.

“Ah Yuto, I’m so happy!” Kino giggled, waving his hands in the air and whooping. Several heads turned in their direction, and Yuto quickly pulled down Kino’s arms.

“Kino I think it’s time to stop drinking, you’ve had plenty tonight… wait when did you have this much?” Yuto stared in surprise as he saw one, two, three, wait... _four_ bottles of soju on the table. When had they ordered this much? Also, how much of this had Kino drunk? No wonder the boy was tipsier than usual.

“But I’m happy! So happy,” Kino whined, pouting his lips at Yuto. He poured himself one more glass, and pleaded Yuto, “just one more?”

“No that’s enough Kino.” Yuto took the glass from Kino and quickly drank it. The bitter liquor stung as it spread up his nose, making him scrunch up his face. He never did like soju straight. “Aren’t you always the one telling us to control ourselves since we’re adults now? Come on now, help me wake up Wooseok.”

“I just wanted to be fun tonight. Not a killjoy like usual,” Kino sighed, leaning on Yuto’s shoulder. When Yuto looked down, he noticed how small and delicate Kino looked. “Am I not fun to be around?” he whispered, the end of his lips pointing downwards. 

“You are Kino, you always are. What's going on, did something happen today?” Yuto asked, peering at him. Kino just smiled.

“No, I’m just so grateful that I can spend time with two of my favourite people in the world. You know how much I love you and Wooseok right?” Kino wrapped his arms around Yuto’s waist and squeezed tightly. “Don’t you guys ever leave me, okay?”

“Alright Kino, I love you too. Now get off and let’s go home.” Yuto got up and Kino followed him, with his arms still wrapped around him. He shook Wooseok gently first, then harder. Finally he poked him in the armpits which led to him yelping and sitting up straight.

“You could have just woken me up normally,” Wooseok grumbled, rubbing his eyes. “Oh man, what time is it?”

“It’s past 12 am,” Yuto looked at his watch. “I think Kino’s had too much to drink tonight. I’m going to call a taxi so that we can go back home now. He’s practically like dead weight right now,” he pointed to the boy who was snuggling his head into Yuto’s back.

“How unlike him. Eh, whatever, I don’t care as long as I get to sleep soon,” Wooseok mumbled, resting his head back on the table. After Yuto paid the restaurant, he managed to wake Wooseok up again and drag his two friends outside. It was another challenge to shove them into the taxi, but the most difficult task was when he had to carry them into the flat. By the time they were in the house, Yuto was sweating in his jumper and basically pushed Wooseok onto his bed. At this point, he was carrying Kino on his back and all he wanted to do was fall to the floor. With much restraint, he managed to lay Kino onto his bed gently. After he pulled down the extra mattress onto their bedroom floor and covered it with blankets, he approached Wooseok. By now Wooseok was fast asleep, and he knew there wasn’t any point in waking him up to brush his teeth or wash his face. He pulled off his shoes and socks and managed to at least change his clothes into his pajamas after some effort. Since Wooseok was taller than Yuto now, the time it took him to do this felt extraordinarily long, and Yuto internally cursed at Wooseok’s long limbs.

“Kino, wake up,” Yuto whispered, shaking the boy’s shoulder. He felt bad waking him, especially since he looked so peaceful lying there with half a smile. Even after so many years, Kino still looked exactly like the innocent boy he'd first met 7 years ago. Except looking carefully, Yuto noticed how defined his cheekbones, nose and jawline had become. When had all that baby fat of his disappeared? 

'Maybe Kino isn't eating too well,' Yuto thought to himself. He had been rather busy the past few weeks, working extra shifts at his part-time job as well as studying for his exams. Habitually, Yuto cupped his hand onto Kino’s face, which was soft and smooth. He hadn’t drawn the curtains in his room, so the moonlight through the window was shining down on Kino and illuminated his pale skin. Yuto noticed the first couple of buttons of his white shirt were open, revealing the beginning of Kino's collarbones which were well defined against his chest. Without thinking, Yuto’s hands slipped from his face, down his neck and trailed towards his chest. Kino twitched slightly and suddenly aware of what he was doing, Yuto slapped Kino’s chest.

“Ow!” Kino cried. Yuto felt bad, but at least he was awake now. “What’s going on?”

“Kino, we’re in my room right now. Do you want to get changed into comfier clothes?” Yuto asked quickly, helping him take off his jacket. He didn’t know why but he felt a wave of guilt wash over him as if he’d done or seen something he shouldn’t have. He'd seen Kino naked a couple of times, when they had gone to bathhouses or while getting dressed. However, that had been when they were much younger. Until now, Yuto hadn't realised how much of Kino's body had well, _matured_. 

“What, are you going to help me get undressed?” Kino chuckled with a slight slur, and then he wrapped his arm around Yuto’s neck. Suddenly Yuto felt very, very self-conscious of how close to each other they were. Kino had never been afraid of displaying his affection towards Yuto, especially in the form of skinship. Heck, he'd been kissed on the cheek multiple times by Kino when they were younger. But it hadn’t meant anything because it had come from Kino, someone he'd known for years. Yet, why did he suddenly look so unfamiliar to him? Kino was no longer smiling but was staring straight at Yuto with half-lidded eyes. He was doing that habit he did when he was tired or nervous, which was biting the corner of his lip. Normally Yuto scolded him whenever this happened. Now, all he could do was stare at his lips.

“Kino, what are you…” Yuto spluttered, only to stop when he realised Kino’s face was getting closer to his. Immediately he panicked. What on earth was Kino doing? More importantly, what was Yuto going to do about it? Alarm bells were going off in his brain, but as if in shock, Yuto could do nothing but stare at what was happening. Suddenly Kino’s eyes closed and his head dropped a second later to rest on Yuto’s chest. He could feel the blood rushing in his ears and the _thud, thud, thud_ of his heart beating against his chest, which was rising up and down heavily. If he had felt tipsy before, he was wide awake now.

Yuto didn’t let himself think for a moment longer; he quickly laid Kino down on his pillow, pulled the bed sheets over his body and got changed into his pajamas. He brushed his teeth and washed his face while humming to a random tune, then grabbed an extra blanket and tried to make himself comfortable on the couch in the living room. The couch was too short for him, and he had to curl up in the fetus position to be able to lie down, but it was better than sleeping in his room where Wooseok and Kino were. That night, he couldn’t sleep. In the end, it took him three episodes of One Piece reruns to drown out his thoughts, before he could fall asleep.

In the end, Yuto only managed to sleep 2 hours, waking up at 7 am. The moment he opened his eyes, he felt his head throb. When he walked past his room, he saw the back of Kino's figure lying on his bed and froze. Instead, he decided to go out for a run to clear up his mind. By the time he came back home, only a grumpy Wooseok was present in his room and a note left from Kino saying he had to go to work. Later that day, Kino sent a text to Yuto to apologise for having drunk so much that night, and Yuto just replied back to him as usual. So what if Kino had made his heart skip for the first time? Yuto was also drunk that night, and he already knew that Kino was full of charm and skinship even without alcohol. Nothing unusual had happened. Everything was normal.

 

\---------------

 

So earlier today, when he heard from Wooseok that Kino was joining them for dinner tonight, he told himself, 'it's okay, everything is normal.' It was going to be his first time seeing Kino since that night, as for the past week all three of them had been busy with other personal schedules. Yuto had been relieved by this, as he had been worried about how he would react when he saw Kino. Just in case he did randomly meet Kino, he’d been staring at photos of him so that he wouldn’t freak out about seeing him in person. So after their lectures ended, Yuto and Wooseok had waited outside the university gates. While Wooseok had been listing off all the types of food he wanted to eat, Yuto had just nodded as if he was listening when really he'd been giving himself a pep talk.

‘Everything is normal,’ Yuto had repeated to himself when he saw a familiar figure wave excitedly at them.

‘Everything is normal,’ Yuto had chanted in his head as Kino hugged Wooseok and then opened up his arms at Yuto, beaming as if they hadn’t met in years.

‘Everything is normal,’ he had forced himself to remember as Kino had embraced him. And for a moment everything had been normal until Kino had reached for Yuto’s hand. Suddenly, as if a switch inside of him had turned on, something changed. It was the same Kino, the same hand which had grabbed his seven years ago. Yet, for the first time in his life, holding Kino's hand had made his heart beat so fast that it had scared him. So what had been different that time?

‘It’s me.’ The thought suddenly brought Yuto back to the present moment and caused him to abruptly stop outside the door to his flat. It was eerily quiet, except for Yuto’s heavy breathing. He must have been walking at a fast pace for the whole trip back home because it hadn’t even taken him 15 minutes to get home. ‘It’s me that’s changed.’

“Crap,” Yuto muttered. If it weren’t already so late, he would have gone out for a run to clear his mind, but he knew he had an early lecture tomorrow morning and should get to sleep. He unlocked the door and saw that the light in his room was on.

“How was dinner?” Yuto asked, dropping his bag to the floor and taking off his jacket. Wooseok was sitting at his desk, with his notebook and textbook laid out. However, in his hand was his cell phone with the latest song from whatever band he was into now blasting from it.

“Ruined because you weren’t there,” Wooseok replied, his eyes still glued to his phone. “We ended up eating chicken but all Kino would talk about was how you weren’t there. In the end, I had to buy him a coffee so that he would shut up about you.”

“Well I’m glad to see that at least one of you guys care about me,” Yuto said, pretending to clutch his chest in pain. “I thought we were best friends, Wooseok.”

“We are, but it doesn’t mean we have to see and talk to each other all the time,” Wooseok finally looked up to watch Yuto. “Kino is different on the other hand. He thinks that something is going on with you. He was asking me whether you’ve been falling behind your studies or something.”

“I’m doing fine, I just thought that I should pay attention to my grades for once. Shouldn’t you guys be congratulating me?” Yuto smirked, although his heart began to beat a little bit faster. He should really learn to be himself around Kino again, or else this was going to become troublesome.

Wooseok shrugged. “I’m fine with everything, I mean I see you all the time even if I don’t want to. It’s Kang Kino you need to persuade, not me. You know how he is, show him some love aye? Just do anything to reassure him, please.”

“Alright, alright,” Yuto sighed, starting to type a text message. What was there to say to him, _I’m sorry, my heart beats faster than it should when you touch me. Please don’t be creeped out, we’re still friends right?_

Instead he sent, _I’m sorry I couldn’t have dinner with you and Wooseok today._

_“But you’re all good with everything, right?” Wooseok asked casually, but there was a tone of concern in his sentence. Yuto smiled; despite acting gruff and keeping up a cool appearance, he knew that Wooseok was a good friend. This was precisely why he couldn’t talk to Wooseok about how he was feeling. How on earth would he explain it to Wooseok, who had known Kino for longer than himself? Either he would laugh or punch Yuto in the face, or maybe both._

_“Yeah, of course, I mean how could I not be? Nothing unusual or interesting ever happens to me,” Yuto said as he started to get changed into his pajamas. Behind him, he could hear Wooseok chuckle in agreement._

_His phone pinged, and he checked to see that Kino had already replied back. _It’s okay, you just owe us food next time. Hope you got lots of work done today, remember not to get too stressed out and that I’m here to listen if you want to talk about anything! Damn, Kino was the perfect friend sometimes. He would always wait for Yuto to approach him first, rather than forcing him to talk. He had the sudden urge to throw his phone against the wall, but that would definitely not persuade Wooseok that everything was alright, so he resisted.__

__Ping. Yuto checked his phone. _Remember I love you.__ _

__This time Yuto couldn’t help it. He groaned, and Wooseok looked up from his textbook. “Something wrong?”_ _

__“Kino just being himself, showing his affection for us.”_ _

__“Of course. It’s as if Kino has to remind us every week that he cares about us,” Wooseok shook his head, but he was smiling. “He’s so strange.”_ _

__“Yeah,” Yuto agreed, but he wasn’t smiling with him. _I know you do_ , he replied back._ _

__

__He just didn’t know what his own feelings were._ _


	4. Exploring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuto becomes more honest about his feelings and finds himself in an unexpected situation.

The next day, Yuto woke up in a sweat. He brushed his shaking fingers over his mouth, and the brief memory of a familiar pair of soft lips pressing against his own flickered in his mind. He forced himself out of his bed (even though it was only 5 am), brushed his teeth vigorously and went out for a run.

The same thing happened the day after, as well as the next couple of days. Every day, after his lectures finished, he would tell Wooseok that he was going to the library and spend a good couple of hours working on his assignment. He’d come home late, fall asleep as soon as he got comfortable in his bed and dreamed the same dream. As soon as he woke up the next day, the mixed feeling of confusion and thrill was enough to get him up and running again. He was pretty sure that he hadn’t trained this hard even during the baseball season in high school. To be positive, at least he was a lot more productive than he usually was. For one thing, he had completed his assignment. However, he felt exhausted from all the exercise that he was doing and not being able to talk to Wooseok or Kino was making him feel lonely. Yet, he didn’t know if he could face Kino at the moment, especially when he had a good (or was it bad?) feeling about whose lips were in his dreams.

“Man, what’s wrong with your face?” Jinho grimaced when he saw Yuto. He was a senior at his university who also worked at the same convenience store as him. They were on the same shift that Saturday night, which Yuto was glad for. Jinho appeared quiet and timid, but after working a couple of shifts with him, Yuto discovered that he was humorous and a lot of fun. Also, he was brutally honest at all times, which meant that Yuto really must have looked that awful.

“What do you mean?” Yuto looked at his face in the reflection of the convenience store’s door and squinted. “Is there something on my face?”

“You look like you haven’t been sleeping for days. Also, you seem skinnier than usual, and that’s saying something,” Jinho curtly replied as he placed the convenience store’s cap on his head. “Is university that tough right now? Want any help?”

“No thanks, I'm actually on track of things for once.”

“Financial problems then? I mean this part-time job doesn’t give much money, does it?” Jinho asked, nodding in self-agreement but Yuto shook his head. 

“No, I’m okay with that too. I guess you’re right, I haven’t been sleeping that well recently,” Yuto rubbed his shoulders, which had been aching for the past few days. Probably from the amount of work he'd been doing at the library. Was this how Kino always felt from all the study he did? No wonder he was always pestering Wooseok and him to massage him whenever exams were over. 

“You really look like you could do with a good night’s sleep. Or a drink,” Jinho snorted. A couple of rowdy young adults, probably first-year university students, entered the store and so Jinho and Yuto were busy for the next couple of minutes. Soon after, it became quiet again. This was one of the reasons why Yuto enjoyed his job; for most of the time, the convenience store was relatively slow-paced, and he could usually just do his own thing.

“Well do you want to talk about it?” Jinho asked. Instinctively, Yuto was going to deny his offer politely but then stopped. Generally, in the past Jinho had given him some pretty good advice. He was trustworthy, yet not too close to Yuto to know who his friends were. Also, he was a rather private man who didn't like to gossip. Since he couldn’t talk to Wooseok or Kino about this matter, he hadn’t been able to ask anyone what on earth was going on with himself. If he didn’t discuss it with someone soon, he was going to get so frustrated that he would probably end up doing something stupid.

“Well...” Yuto slowly said, and Jinho looked briefly surprised. “I guess so. You wouldn’t tell anyone would you?”

Jinho put his right arm on the left side of his chest and looked at Yuto solemnly. “I promise on our business-relationship that I will not tell anyone what you say unless you’ve committed a crime.”

“Well… I have this friend,” Yuto explained, rubbing his fingers together. Jinho looked at him expectantly, and Yuto hesitated. He hoped he was doing the right thing. “We’ve been friends for a long time, and they’re someone important to me. I’ve known them ever since I came to live here and I guess they’ve always been there for me, you know?”

“Go on,” Jinho encouraged him, taking a seat behind the counter.

“But recently… I don’t know, something feels different. Ever since two weeks ago, the way I feel towards this friend changed. I don’t really know how to describe it, but it’s been making me uneasy,” Yuto explained.

Jinho looked intrigued. “Well, what happened two weeks ago? Did you guys fight?

“No no no, nothing like that. We were drinking with another good friend of mine, and we were all drunk so we went back to my flat, and…” And what? Yuto tried to utter the words but didn’t know how. How could he describe the feeling he felt when Kino had looked at him in that way? For a moment he felt ashamed of himself. “You know what? It was nothing,” Yuto waved his hands dismissively.

“No, you should continue. I still don’t get what’s going on,” Jinho told him. “So you guys got drunk and went back to your flat. So what happened afterward?”

Yuto’s face burned. He didn’t want to tell Jinho about how he had reacted, in case he thought Yuto was a pervert. Sure, Yuto knew himself that he wasn’t a lustful person... at least he thought not. Actually, he wasn't 100% certain now, considering the last couple of days. “Nothing really, I just helped them get to bed. But since then, I’ve been avoiding my friend because I feel like I won’t be able to be myself around them.”

“What specifically are you afraid will happen when you meet this friend?” Jinho pressed him on.

“I don’t know… oh, wait I do. This friend has a lot of affection, so they hug me and hold my hands. In the past that didn’t bother me, because they’ve done it since I was young. But now…” Yuto swallowed. “I feel weird. I just want to push my friend away, or get away from them. Don't get me wrong; I really treasure this friend of mine. I want to talk to them and be with them like I usually do, but I’m personally finding it hard to.”

Jinho didn’t answer him for a minute. Then, ever so slowly and cautiously, he asked, “do you like this friend?”

“Of course,” Yuto answered immediately. “Did you not just hear what I said? This person is my friend.”

“Not only as a friend, you dummy,” Jinho pushed him lightly. “I mean romantically. Do you have those kinds of feelings towards them?”

Even though subconsciously, Yuto had already considered this very idea, he still felt a sensation of shock ripple down his spine. “No!”

“No?” Jinho repeated, closely looking at Yuto’s expression. “Are you sure?”

Yuto tried to protest but didn't know how. “I mean… I don’t see why I would. Feel that way towards them, I mean.”

“Why? Are they rude? Mean?”

“No, none of that. They’re the nicest and friendliest person I’ve ever met. And a really good person,” Yuto replied softly, then sighed. “It’s just… we’ve been friends for 7 years. They’re like my family, I’ve never thought of them in any other way. And he’s a guy,” Yuto added on, grabbing hold of a pencil and using it to tap on the counter to relieve some of his nervousness.

“Oh. Okay,” Jinho cocked his head to the side. “So what if he’s a guy?”

“I’ve never, in my whole life, been attracted to a guy. Not once in my life,” Yuto shook his head. “All my past relationships have been with girls.”

“Well, maybe you’re a late bloomer then. Have you considered that?" Jinho pursed his lips and frowned. "I don’t see why you’re in so much denial, Yuto. So what if you have feelings for your friend? Why is that something to be afraid of?”

“It’s just…” Yuto stammered, and Jinho stepped closer to him.

“Just what?”

“He’s… my friend! Like, my brother. I don’t want to lose him.” Finally, the thought that had been haunting Yuto exploded out of him. “I would rather pretend that nothing has changed and continue to be his friend. I respect him, and he’s one of the most important people to me. I’m just so confused because I’ve never felt this way towards him. Or anyone, actually. It feels wrong.” Without realising, Yuto snapped the pencil that he had been holding.

“No?” Jinho repeated, closely looking at Yuto’s expression. “Are you sure?”

Yuto tried to protest, but didn't know how. “I mean… I don’t see why I would. Feel that way towards them, I mean.”

“Why? Are they rude? Mean?” 

“No, none of that. They’re the nicest and friendliest person I’ve ever met. And a really good person,” Yuto replied softly, then sighed. “It’s just… we’ve been friends for 7 years. They’re like my family, I’ve never thought of them in any other way. And he’s a guy,” Yuto added on, grabbing hold of a pencil and using it to tap on the counter to relieve some of his nervousness. 

“Oh. Okay,” Jinho cocked his head to the side. “So what if he’s a guy?” 

“I’ve never, in my whole life, been attracted to a guy. Not once in my life,” Yuto shook his head. “All my past relationships have been with girls.”

“Well, maybe you’re a late bloomer then. Have you considered that? I don’t see why you’re in so much denial, Yuto. So what if you have feelings for your friend? Why is that something to be afraid of?” 

“It’s just…” Yuto stammered and Jinho stepped closer to him. 

“Just what?” 

“He’s… my friend! Like, my brother. I don’t want to lose him.” Finally, the thought that had been haunting Yuto exploded out of him. “I would rather pretend that nothing has changed and continue to be his friend. I really respect him, and he’s one of the most important people to me. I’m just so confused because I’ve never felt this way towards him. Or anyone, actually. It feels wrong.” Without realising, Yuto snapped the pencil that he had been holding. 

“Er, how about you dropped that pencil down and use your words, not your strength, to explain how you feel,” Jinho smiled. 

“Sorry,” Yuto said, doing as he was told. The two of them sat in silence for a couple of seconds until Jinho spoke up. 

“So what are you going to do with this revelation? You can’t just avoid your friend forever, or they’ll think that something is going on with you. Have you not considered confessing your feelings to him?”

The mere thought made Yuto clench his fists. “Definitely not. Things will get weird between us and I think it will be difficult to continue being friends. Besides, it’s way too early for that. Who knows, maybe these feelings are temporary and will disappear soon.” 

“So you don’t want to be in a relationship with him? Go on dates, do that jazz?” 

Yuto thought about it. What did he do with his previous girlfriends? Go to the movies, eat out together. Wasn’t that basically what he and Kino already did now?

“No, I don’t want to go out with him.”

“Well.. what do you want to do? Spend time alone with him? Do things you wouldn’t do with other people… like kiss him?” 

Without thinking, the images from his dreams appeared in his mind. “Stop! Isn’t that too personal to ask?” Yuto yelled and at the same time, a customer entered the store. The customer looked confused and was about to step out so Yuto had to quickly apologise. When the customer had purchased what he needed and left the store, Yuto’s ears were still warm. 

“You act like such a 10-year-old,” Jinho laughed, poking Yuto’s cheeks. “Don’t pretend like you have such an innocent mind, I can see the colour of your ears.”

“It’s just weird. I don’t want to feel this way,” Yuto sighed. Why couldn’t he go back to last month when everything had been fine? “I mean imagine if your really good friend, who you’ve known since you were younger, suddenly confessed that they had feelings for you. Wouldn’t you be freaked out? Not only that, but I have another close friend who is friends with both of us. They would probably be the most freaked out.” Yuto shivered at the face Wooseok would make if he and Kino ever announced that they were dating. 

Jinho laughed. “I guess it would feel strange at first, but I think I could warm up to the idea. I mean don’t be so negative. So, you’re not going to try dating this friend of yours, or confess your feelings. You’re just going to continue to hide how you feel, be their friend and hope that your feelings will eventually go away?”

“That’s the plan.”

Jinho’s smile vanished. “But what about you? Aren’t you going to be suffering through all this? I mean what if your friend starts liking someone else, or gets into a relationship? What if by then, you still like him?”

Yuto considered it. “Well if it means I can be friends with him, and if he’s happy, then I don’t mind suffering a little. It’ll be my own choice anyway.” 

Jinho shook his head sadly at Yuto. “It won’t work out that easily, my friend. Have you never been in an unrequited love, or had a crush on someone? Ugh, you disgust me,” Jinho mockingly sighed when Yuto shook his head. “Well trust me, it’s hard. Especially if this is a close friend.”

“I’ve been thinking though, what if it’s because I haven’t been in a relationship for a couple of years? Maybe I’m just lonely or something,” Yuto stated. 

This was one of the main questions he had been having for the last couple of days. His last relationship had been in high school, with a girl who he’d seen a couple of times at his baseball games, giggling with a group of other girls in his year. Later he’d received a note asking to meet him outside the gym after school ended. The girl had confessed that she liked Yuto since the beginning of the year, and he could still remember how her fingers trembled when she asked him out. Yuto had never felt romantic feelings towards someone, although he did think of some people as attractive. For example, the girl had been cute and pretty. But he had never felt anything more than that, never understood why people wanted to be in a relationship. For his whole life, he had been happy with just having Wooseok and Kino by his side. Who else knew how to make him laugh, what he hated and his deepest secrets? At the time though, the girl looked as if she was going to cry and Yuto hated it when people cried. Besides, he admired her courage and was curious about whether he could also one day share the same feelings. So he accepted her confession and they had gone out for a year. Kino was ecstatic when he found out he had a girlfriend and told him that he liked her. Wooseok was less interested, grunting that they didn’t match each other but still wished him the best. Through their time together, Yuto actually grew fond of the girl and he had been pretty happy. The girl was kind and they shared similar interests. He enjoyed their time together and the two of them had been pretty compatible, even sexually. Yet in their entire relationship, there had been no sparks or the feelings of euphoria that were always mentioned in movies and songs. So he wasn’t surprised when the girl decided one day to end their relationship. She said that he was a good boyfriend, but she knew that he didn’t love her. She was moving to a different city for university anyways, and they both knew that they didn’t have the kind of relationship to make long-distance dating work. Still, they managed to end their relationship on good terms and even now Yuto still kept in contact with her. 

So was Yuto lonely? Sometimes. Sure, he had a pretty good social life and most of the time he was too busy to feel the absence of a lover. Still, there were those nights where Yuto craved the touch of another person, such as the sensation of someone’s fingers running through his hair, or the heat of pleasure spread through his entire body. He was human after all. 

“That’s a good point,” Jinho contemplated, biting his lips. “Or like you said, you haven’t had a romantic attraction towards another guy before. Maybe you should explore whether you’re just wanting to be with someone, or if you have feelings for other guys. Hey, want me to set you up on a date?” Jinho exclaimed, suddenly standing up in excitement. 

“A date?” Yuto blinked. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.”

“Well why not? You said yourself that it could be because you’re lonely. Come on, it will be a good experience to see whether you're attracted to other guys as well, or if it’s just your friend. Besides, I have a friend who needs to go on a date. Well?” Jinho insisted, staring at Yuto with big round eyes and smiling. 

“Well…”

 

Which was how Yuto found himself booked for next Friday night, with a date.


	5. Poison

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuto realises that he should be careful about the promises that he makes.

Every morning, Yuto went to the same cafe to order coffee. The cafe was called Poison, which Wooseok, Kino and him had found in their first year of university. As the cafe’s name suggested, the coffee was terrible. However, it was located between Yuto’s flat and Kino’s residential hall, open twenty-four hours and had WiFi, so it quickly became their go-to place to meet up. He was ordering his short black as usual when he heard someone call his name.

“Yuto!” Kino waved his hand frantically. He was sitting at the far end of the cafe, dressed in a navy sweater with a white collar shirt underneath. Yuto could see that Kino was wearing his glasses as well, which probably meant that he was in the middle of a seriously text-heavy assignment. Did he have to look that happy, with his cheeks rosy and smile so wide that he could see all of his teeth even from the counter?

Yuto couldn’t help it; he smiled and waved back. After paying for his coffee and a cinnamon bun, he took a deep breath and walked over to where Kino was.

‘It’s okay, it’s only Kino,’ Yuto reminded himself. Since his talk with Jinho a couple of days ago, he felt more prepared about being with Kino, and he was glad to find that he was able to look at him straight in the eye as he sat in the chair in front of him. From up close, Yuto could see that although Kino looked more tired than usual, his skin was still flawless and he appeared to be full of energy. He had owned the same pair of glasses since the beginning of high school, and Yuto swore than out of everyone he knew, Kino looked the best with glasses on. He only wore it when he was using his laptop often, which was perched on the cafe table right now. Along with his sweater, he was wearing khaki shorts with his black sneakers and long white socks. Seeing him now, Yuto was reminded of the younger version of Kino and chuckled.

“What are you laughing at?” Kino asked, sipping from his cup and then wincing at the taste. Knowing Kino, it was probably a mochaccino. Knowing Poison though, it was probably not the sweet, rich taste which Kino usually enjoyed.

“You look like you’re in high school again,” Yuto answered, and Kino laughed. Oh, how Yuto had missed hearing it. Kino’s laugh could make anyone happy, and right now all Yuto wanted to do was hear it over again and again.

“Well, I wish I had the same energy as I did then. I’m already exhausted, and it’s only 7 am.” Kino rubbed his eyes, and now that Yuto looked carefully, he could see that they were a little red.

“How come? Have you been staying up lately?”

“Kind of. We have this assignment due soon and it’s taking up more time than I thought,” Kino replied cheerily, and then his eyes grew wide. The waitress was coming over with Yuto’s order, but Kino’s eyes were glued to the cinnamon bun. Unlike the coffees made at Poison, the food was pretty good. It was another reason why they were able to continue to meet up at Poison, or else Wooseok would have refused.

“Here, it’s for you,” Yuto told him and began to cut up the cinnamon bun into smaller pieces. He knew that Kino was a sucker for baking, particularly those with icing. This particular cinnamon bun was made today, Yuto could tell, as it was extra fluffy and soft-looking. There was glaze drizzled everywhere, and the nutty smell was aromatic. Kino’s eyes were practically devouring it already, and he looked at Yuto as if he was an angel. Yuto could feel his stomach flutter, and he had a hard time resisting the urge to rub Kino’s cheeks like he usually did. In the past, he would have done it without another thought (because Kino had always been cute) but now he just felt like he had an ulterior motive.

“Yuto, you always know what I like. Thank you, that's exactly what I need!” Kino grinned and grabbed a piece with his hand. “Open your mouth!” he said, raising his hand with the cinnamon bun towards Yuto’s mouth.

“Oh no, I’m fine. You should have it, you know I don’t like sweet stuff,” Yuto protested, quickly waved his hands. It was true; he didn’t like sweet stuff. More importantly, he did not want Kino to feed him. But Kino was staring at him with eyes that were pleading him and Yuto was slowly melting from it. He realised that even after so many years, Yuto was never able to refuse Kino's requests. Then, his stomach betrayed him by making a ridiculously loud rumbling noise, and Yuto looked down to avoid Kino’s cheeky grin.

“Even if you don’t, you’re hungry. Come on, say ‘ahhh’.” Kino pushed his hand closer, and Yuto had no choice but to do as he said. He felt Kino's fingers touch the side of his lips as Yuto took in the piece of cinnamon bun and then saw those same fingers enter Kino’s mouth as he sucked the remaining icing off. It wasn't a particularly provocative action, but Yuto could feel his ears warm up again. He cursed at his not-so-innocent mind.

“Errr so,” Yuto coughed from how dry his throat had suddenly become, “apart from the assignment what else have you been up to?”

Kino looked up as he pondered over this question. “Hmm, nothing different really. I’m still working at Pretty Pretty although I’ve managed to decrease the number of my shifts, thank goodness. I thought I was going to collapse last semester,” Kino sighed in relief. Pretty Pretty was the restaurant which Kino had been working at since they started university. The manager of Pretty Pretty was Hui, a family friend of Kino and Wooseok who used to live in the same neighbourhood as them when they were children. So when Kino told him he'd been accepted to the university, Hui had offered a job to an ecstatic Kino. Probably this was because as long as they'd been friends, Hui had been Kino’s role model. Yuto could understand why, as he'd met Hui a couple of times whenever he went over to the restaurant. Although Hui was five years older than them, he always greeted them first with a friendly smile. He also let Kino take home any left-overs that they had, although they usually were stolen by Wooseok. Hui allowed his younger colleagues to talk casually with him, but he was still a natural leader who others depended on and respected. There was a natural charisma to him, and Hui could become extremely quiet and stern when he had to be. For example, Yuto remembered the time Hui caught Wooseok under-age smoking. Although Wooseok never explained what happened, he never saw Wooseok hold a cigarette from that day on. 

“It’s about time,” Yuto replied. “You worked too much. I’m surprised you didn’t collapse or get sick. You know that if you asked Hui, he would easily cut down your hours.”

Kino shook his head. “No it’s okay, I needed the money anyway. Besides, it’s kind of busy at the restaurant at the moment. I felt like I needed to be helpful.” It was this kind of attitude from Kino that made Yuto both feel admiration and frustration for Kino. Since he was young, Kino was hard-working and always wanted to help others. The only problem was that when Kino was so busy helping others, he'd often forget to look after himself. There were so many experiences of this from the past, such as when he stayed up nights to plan the school fundraisers, volunteered at charity events only to later say that he hadn’t eaten anything all day. One time at school, Kino had gotten up from his seat and fainted from dehydration, as he'd ‘forgotten’ to drink anything the whole day. Sometimes Yuto felt like he was his mother, as he was constantly telling Kino to take care of himself. Often, he and Wooseok joked that Kino would be the worst lawyer as he was too soft-hearted.

“Well I’m sure Hui wouldn’t want you to get stressed from working when you’re still a student,” Yuto told him firmly. He wished that Kino would look after himself. When they were in high school, the three of them were always together and could help each other help; Wooseok with his rebellious don’t-screw-with-me phase, Yuto’s struggle to keep up with both baseball and studies, reminding and sometimes forcing Kino to take breaks or eat his meals. Now that they were in university and doing their separate things, Kino was getting worse with eating meals. Sometimes the only way to make sure he ate something for the day was to drag him out for food.

“Okay okay, mother Yuto,” Kino poked out his tongue jokingly, and Yuto pretended to hit him on the head. He was glad that he was able to be himself around Kino again, even though he still felt a little self-conscious. He knew Kino wouldn’t be able to hear it, but his heart still thumped like crazy whenever Kino's hand brushed against his own. It would take time for him to grow accustomed to that. “So Yuto, when are you free this week? I haven’t seen you in ages; you’ve been working so hard these days! I miss you,” Kino asked, pouting. Yuto noticed his lips were cracked, and he could see bits of raw skin where Kino had been biting. He wondered what it would feel like, to kiss those lips.

“Um, I don’t really know,” Yuto replied, still staring at his lips. They probably wouldn’t feel too nice, but he still wanted to feel them against his own. “I guess maybe towards the end of this week. When are you free?”

“Let me think,” Kino pursed his lips with an expression of concentration. Maybe, in Kino’s place, he could bite Kino’s lips instead. He wouldn’t mind that, sucking lightly on them until they grew plump and red. Actually, he would like that a lot. “How about Friday? Yuto, what are you staring at?”

“Huh?” Yuto snapped out of his daze quickly, to see Kino have a look of amusement on his face. “Sorry, it’s just that your lips look chapped. Have you been biting them again?” Ugh, did Yuto have to blurt out what was on his mind?

“Huh? Uh yeah, I guess. You know I do that when I get nervous,” Kino said, quickly taking a look through the reflection of his phone.

“Yeah, but it’s worse than usual. Everything okay with you?” Yuto asked, taking a closer look. It was true that Kino was a lip biter, but it did look particularly bad this morning. Yuto briefly flashed back to Kino’s bright, tipsy smile on that night two weeks ago. He wondered if he should have questioned Kino's actions more back then. He'd been so absorbed in his own matters that he hadn’t considered whether something was going on with Kino. Unless you were paying proper attention, it was difficult to tell when Kino was struggling until signs started showing up, like the raw lips or weight loss.

Kino smiled. Was it just Yuto or did that smile look a little sad? “Yeah, everything is fine. I just miss my best friend!” he grumbled, and Yuto felt a pang of guilt stab him right where his heart would be. “I understand if you’ve been busy, but you haven’t been replying back to my texts. I wanted to be the one to ask you if you were okay, silly.” Kino poked his hand, then looped his fingers around Yuto’s. They looked small compared to his own, and Yuto had the urge to wrap his hands around Kino’s tightly.

“I’m fine too, I’m sorry I’ve been absent,” Yuto softly said.

“It’s okay, I was just worried about you. Are you sure that you don’t want to tell me anything?” Kino asked, and for a split second, Yuto considered just confessing his feelings right then. Kino was staring at him with the corners of his mouth perked up ever so slightly so that there was only a subtle sign of a smile. His eyes were unfazed, and Yuto wondered how until now, he'd been able to look at him without noticing how beautiful he was. He didn't know if he ever would deserve someone like Kino. 

So instead, he smiled.

“Not really but thanks, Kino. You need to focus more on looking after yourself,” he scolded him. Yuto glanced at the way they were holding hands and then looked away. “So what day was it that you wanted to meet up?”

“This coming Friday, at night. I should have finished my assignment by then, and we can do something after I finish work,” Kino offered.

Yuto was about to say yes, then remembered something. “Oh wait, I can’t do that. What about Saturday?”

Kino shook his head. “I have work and club stuff to do then. What do you have on Friday night for once?”

Yuto swallowed. That was the day he was supposed to have a date with whoever Jinho had set him up with. He had two choices. He could tell the truth and say that he was going on a date with some stranger to see whether his feelings for Kino were genuine. Or, he could just lie. “Um, I have a meeting with someone.”

Kino raised his eyebrow. “Oh yeah, who?”

Another bad thing about being friends with someone for a long time was that they knew everyone involved in your life. Also, they could tell when you were lying very, very easily. “I don’t think you know them,” Kino answered truthfully. “It’s for er, you know, a project.” Well, sort of. A personal project.

“Oh, that’s cool.” If Kino noticed his lie, he didn’t acknowledge it. “Then, what about Sunday?”

“Yeah I can do that,” Yuto agreed, relieved. Sometimes Kino could be scarily quick-witted and right now that was not a good thing. He should really practice lying more often. “I’m free all day, so just text me when you want to meet up. Ah, I should get to class now,” Yuto said, looking at the time on his watch. He released his hands and was relieved to see that although Kino still made him jittery, he could at least act like himself and enjoy being with Kino. Overall, he thought that their encounter today was going pretty well. Maybe he would get over his strange feelings for Kino more quickly than he thought.

“Yeah I should get going too, I need to go back to my room before I have my lecture,” Kino told him, packing up his belongings and shoving the rest of the cinnamon bun into his mouth. They got up, and when they were outside, Kino suddenly wrapped his arms around Yuto’s waist and snuggled his head against his chest.

“K-Kino?” Yuto stammered. He was pretty sure that Kino could now hear his heart race and he wanted to pull away from Kino as far as he could. He hoped that he would think it was just from the coffee. “What’s up?”

“I just wanted to hug you,” Kino replied. Yuto wanted to scream. Did he not know how heart-fluttering his words were? Yuto suddenly understood the way in which students had gushed over Kino in high school, squealing when he did something like run his fingers through his hair. He, too, wanted to squeal this very moment. Or punch something. “I want you to know that I’ll always be friends with you and Wooseok, no matter how old we are and what happens. Okay?” He took his head off Yuto’s chest and stared at him. Yuto could see the that despite how cute Kino looked right now, he was serious. His eyes were full of sincerity and purity. For the first time, Yuto’s heart sank a little.

“Okay,” Yuto said, ruffling his hair. “I’ll always be friends with you too, Kino. I promise. Happy?”

Kino broke into a wide grin, and he let go of Yuto, twirling around and laughing. “Of course, I’m so happy to hear that! I’ll see you on Sunday then okay?” he waved at Yuto and then ran in the opposite direction. As he disappeared, Yuto could hear him laughing. Yuto stayed where he was until Kino's laughter had faded completely away. Then he sighed.

“You’re being stupid again,” he told himself, his fingers lingering at his shirt where Kino’s embrace had been. He'd better keep the promise he just spoke, even if it meant feeling the ache in his chest that he did right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh I can so relate to how Yuto feels. While I wrote this chapter I was looking at gifs of Kino and how could you not adore this cutie???


	6. First dates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe Pentagon got their song 'Shine' on the Melon Chart's top 100 today (well yesterday for me) woooo!!! That's so exciting and I can't believe how lovely Pentagon and Universes are :) Let's keep supporting them and each other!

It had been a while since Yuto made a proper effort on his appearance. Usually, he had a set style of clothes he wore: black hoodie or t-shirt, black jeans, black sneakers. Black, black, black. Sometimes he’d feel a bit adventurous and switch up his shoes for his boots, but that was really it. Yuto preferred to dress for comfort rather than appearance, and he liked dark clothing which didn’t need as much caring. Wooseok often dressed in black as well, except his clothes were carefully chosen with specific accessories and different textures to show that he was fashionable, not lazy like Yuto. Still, the two of them were often mistaken for members of a gang when they hung out together, and Yuto noticed that people on the street would avoid looking at them directly.

Tonight was different though. Initially, Yuto had gone with a clean black shirt, his black jeans which were ripped at the knees and white sneakers. He thought he didn’t look too bad, and even his hair wasn’t sticking up in funny places like it occasionally did.

“You’re going out for once on a Friday night?” Wooseok commented. He was dressed in a grey shirt and red track pants, game console in one hand and a packet of chips in another. “I thought we were going to continue our game from last week.”

“Not tonight, sorry,” Yuto told him, trying to find a clean pair of socks which matched. He swore he had bought some new socks at the beginning of the year, but they always seemed to disappear through the multiple laundry washes.

“Where are you going?”

Yuto thought about telling a lie but then decided that it didn't matter. Wooseok probably wouldn’t care or ask for any details. “On a date.”

Or maybe he was wrong because one of Wooseok’s thick eyebrows was raised. “Adachi Yuto, out on a date?”

“So what?” Yuto asked defensively, wishing he hadn’t said anything now.

“How… unlike you. I haven’t seen you out on a date in ages,” Wooseok muttered, still staring at Yuto as if he was seeing him for the first time in days.

“Uh, what about my girlfriend in high school?”

“Precisely, in ages,” Wooseok replied.

“Um, from my memory you haven’t been on a date in forever as well,” Yuto reminded him.

Wooseok scoffed. “Yes I have, I went out last week remember?”

“Wooseok, your hookups don’t count. None of them do.” Yuto replied drily. Every now and then, maybe once a couple of weeks, Wooseok would be mysteriously absent for a couple of hours at night. No matter how much Yuto contacted him, he wouldn’t reply or pick up. The first couple of times had freaked Kino out, but soon they found out that Wooseok’s way of relieving stress was to hit the clubs. Yuto had never gone to a club or been interested, so he didn’t understand what was so fun about dancing with strangers. All he knew was Wooseok wouldn't return home until the next morning, smelling of alcohol and burnt cigarettes. He wouldn't come back home alone either. Every single time, he arrived with some new item which didn't belong to him. The first time it was a new earring. The next time it was a black cap, which Wooseok still sometimes wore. One time Wooseok had come with an entirely new outfit, and when asked about it, Wooseok shrugged and said he needed a fresh change of clothes. Yuto didn’t know what Wooseok enjoyed so much about hooking up with strangers, but he never questioned him. He knew that Wooseok did stupid things, but he trusted him to have some common sense. Or at least he hoped so.

“Whatever,” Wooseok dropped his game console and directed his attention at Yuto. Now he was really regretting this. “So who’s the date?”

“Just some guy a co-worker recommended. It’s nothing serious, I don’t even know what they’re like,” Yuto quickly told him, searching through his drawers for any pair of socks, so that he could get out of the house and stop talking to Wooseok.

“A guy?” Wooseok repeated incredulously. “Adachi Yuto is going on a date with a guy?”

“Will you stop repeating what I say?” Yuto sighed. His back was facing Wooseok, but he was pretty sure that Wooseok would be wearing that annoying smirk of his, and enjoying the moment.

“I’m sorry, it’s just that… you don’t like guys,” Wooseok told him a matter of factly. Yuto rolled his eyes.

“I know I don’t normally like guys. Maybe I’m just trying something new. Aren’t you guys always insisting that I break out of my shell?” Yuto asked exasperatedly. Wooseok was about to reply back, then started to laugh, rolling on his bed. “What now?”

“Have you told Kino about your date?” Wooseok chortled, and Yuto's hand swung for his head. Luckily Wooseok ducked, so Yuto ended up hitting the wall.

“No, I have not told Kino yet. The topic didn’t come up,” Yuto replied stiffly, and Wooseok's long body was curled up and shaking from how hard he was laughing now. “You better not tell him before I do, or I won’t buy any toilet paper on the way home.”

“Fine,” Wooseok said, still smiling. “Imagine when he finds out,” he paused, then covered his hands over his mouth and blinked innocently. Speaking in a higher pitched voice than his usual deep tone, he gasped, “Yuto, you went on a date? Why didn’t you tell me, I could have organised everything for you!”

“Kino does not sound like that,” Yuto told him. Then he couldn't help but smile. “Okay, he kind of does.”

“I’m the best at imitating Kino and you know it,” Wooseok said, finally stopping his laughter and replacing it with a serious face. “But are you really going out on your date like that?”

Yuto looked down at himself. “What’s wrong with how I look?”

“You look like your usual self, which is the problem. Are you going on a date, or are you stopping by the supermarket?”

“For your information, I tried my best. Also, I don’t see you dressing up for your dates,” Yuto tried to take a stab back at Wooseok.

“I thought you said they were hookups and not dates,” Wooseok smirked, and Yuto rolled his eyes. “I’m not saying that you look bad right now. I’m just saying that you don’t look like you're going on a date. Look, let me help.” Wooseok got up from his bed and started rummaging through Yuto’s wardrobe.

“I didn’t ask for your help,” Yuto muttered under his breath, but let Wooseok continue to search through his clothes. Even though he hated it when Wooseok was a smart-ass, he knew that Wooseok had good taste in clothes. Out of the three of them, Wooseok was probably the most well dressed.

“Here, try this on,” Wooseok gave him some clothes, and a few seconds later Yuto was dressed in a black turtleneck long sleeve top and a faded denim jacket of Wooseok's. Luckily they were the same size, so he fitted the jacket. He was wearing the same jeans, but Wooseok had given him a brown belt to wear with it.

“I was going to make you wear denim for your bottom half too, but I thought you would be too uncomfortable wearing double denim,” Wooseok told him, handing him a pair of dangly earrings. “Wear these too. I bought them a while ago but never got around to wearing them so they should be new.”

“Do I have to?” Yuto asked, putting the earring by his ear to see what it would look it.

“Well, what the hell was the point of piercing them with me last year?”

“From my memory, someone was too afraid to do it alone so I had to pierce mine first,” Yuto reminded him, and Wooseok glared, but didn’t reply back. He opened a small round tub with some clear gel in it and applied some to his hand. Then, he rubbed it through Yuto’s hair for what seemed like a couple of minutes.

“Okay you’re done,” Wooseok told him, and then stepped back so he could study his work. “Hey Yuto, you’re looking good. Finally, that face isn’t going to waste.”

Yuto wanted to say something about how he wasn't that bad of a dresser, but Wooseok brought him to the mirror and he had to admit to himself that Wooseok had done well. For one thing, Yuto’s eyebrows could be seen for once, and they were doing an excellent job at framing his face and emphasising his facial bone structure. The earrings also looked a lot better on him than he’d expected.

“Not bad,” Yuto finally said, grabbing his wallet and checking the time. “Thanks, Wooseok. I should get going now.”

“You’re welcome. Of course, you have to clean this mess later,” he added, pointing to the pile of clothes lying on the ground. Yuto nodded and then left the house with a sense of confidence he hadn’t felt in a while.

He was five minutes early when he got to the coffee shop that Jinho told him to wait at, which was close by where Kino worked. Jinho said that he would stay with Yuto and his friend for the first hour so that things wouldn't be awkward. When Yuto asked for his phone number, Jinho said that his friend just recently broke his phone, so Yuto was going to be meeting and talking to this person for the first time. He looked around, saw Jinho sitting down at a table and waved at him.

“Hey Yuto, you look different tonight,” Jinho said as Yuto approached him.

“Why, is it weird?” Yuto asked worriedly.

Jinho laughed. “No, you look good different. Change every now and then is always good, isn’t it? I’m sure my friend will appreciate it.” He checked the time and frowned. “I hope he isn’t late; he can be a bit tardy sometimes. Just in case, I told him to come 10 minutes earlier than the actual time. Oh, also there’s something I need to tell you.” Jinho cleared his throat. “So, I didn’t actually tell my friend that this is a date.”

“What?” Yuto stared at him.

Jinho clapped his hands together and smiled apologetically. “I’m sorry! It’s just that my friend can be shy and he just won’t do something on his own, so he needs a push sometimes. Don’t worry,” he quickly said as Yuto gave him a look of disbelief. “He’s a really cool person. It’s just… don’t be alarmed if he gets a bit annoyed.”

“Well, I don’t blame him,” Yuto told him. He felt slightly foolish now, especially because he still felt rather overdressed. “So what did you tell him this was?”

“Er, I told him that I had someone special that I wanted him to meet.” Jinho shrugged. “It seemed to do the trick. Oh wait, there he is!” Jinho smiled and waved behind Yuto. He turned around and saw a man come towards them. He had an olive skin tone and dark brown hair. Even though he probably didn’t know this was a date, he was wearing a black blazer with a white shirt tucked into light blue denim jeans. Then Yuto almost did a double take. He was also wearing brown leather dress shoes. Dress shoes! Who on earth wore dress shoes casually? Looking at him properly now, Yuto thought that he was handsome but was finding it difficult to tell from the scowl on his face.

“Jinho, what is going on?” the male asked, still standing. He did not look pleased.

“Hongseok, I’m so glad you arrived on time,” Jinho smiled, pulling at Hongseok’s wrist to sit him down. Hongseok glared at Jinho but followed his direction. He glanced at Yuto with what seemed like malice, although he had no idea why he would because all Yuto had done so far was sit next to Jinho. Basically, he was being stared down at for existing. So far, this was going great. “Yuto, this is my friend Hongseok. Hongseok, this is the person I’ve wanted you to meet.”

“Hi,” Yuto said, offering his hand. Hongseok slowly grabbed it, squeezing a little bit harder than Yuto would’ve liked. Already he could tell that Hongseok was well built underneath his blazer. He hoped that the muscles were only for appearance and not because he was good at fighting. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Hi,” Hongseok replied, his eyes fixed on Yuto. He still didn’t look too happy but released his grip. Yuto resisted from massaging his fingers. “How do you two know each other?”

“We work together,” Jinho said, looking cautiously at Hongseok. Despite Jinho being older, he seemed to be wary of his friend. “He’s four years younger than you, Hongseok. Probably one of the first younger guys you know, huh?”

Hongseok stared at Jinho in surprise. “He’s 20 years old? Isn’t that a bit young for you?”

Yuto looked at Hongseok first, then Jinho. Suddenly he had a feeling that he knew what was going on. “Errr I think there’s been-”

“Hang on, your order is ready! I’ll grab it,” Jinho jumped up as the buzzer rang. As Jinho sorted out their order, it was silent between the two men.

Then Hongseok asked, “so what do you think about him?”

“Jinho?” Yuto asked, and Hongseok nodded. Yuto felt like he needed to be very careful about how he answered this question. “He’s a nice hyung,” Yuto said slowly. “Just a nice hyung.” When Hongseok didn’t react, Yuto added, “You know we aren’t dating right?”

“Huh?” For the first time, Hongseok’s scowl dropped, and he looked surprised. Yuto was right; he was very handsome. “What do you mean?”

“Jinho and I aren’t dating,” he clarified with a sigh. So far, nothing was going right. “In fact, it’s you and I who are on a date right now.”

Now Hongseok’s eyes were bulging from its sockets. Yuto would have laughed, but it didn't seem appropriate. “We’re on a date right now? How come?”

“Um because Jinho set us up on one?”

This last comment made Hongseok facial expression switch from being shocked to livid. “That guy,” Hongseok growled, and then looked around the shop. “Where the hell is he anyway?” Yuto turned around to look as well, but he was right. Jinho was nowhere to be seen.

“Maybe he went to the toilet?” Yuto suggested, but Hongseok narrowed his eyes and shook his head. As if on cue, a waitress came up to them with their order and a pink note.

“Um, this was left for you guys,” the waitress giggled, giving the note to Yuto. “Good luck!” she cheered and then ran back to the counter. Yuto shared a look of disbelief with Hongseok, and then read the note:

_To Yuto and Hongseok,_

_I’m leaving you guys to have your date. You guys are welcome. Enjoy yourselves and get to know each other._

_From,  
Your beloved friend, Jinho._

_P.S Hongseok-ah, remember that I’m your hyung okay? Don't be too mean to me :)_

 

“He’s left, hasn’t he,” Hongseok stated gloomily. Yuto nodded, and Hongseok groaned. “Damn, I can’t believe I fell for that one! That guy has guts, trying to fool me again. Never will I believe him again. I thought this was serious for once.”

“You mean he’s done this before?” Yuto asked.

“This is the seventh time,” Hongseok ruffled his hair and sipped his iced americano angrily. “He’s always telling me to go out on a date, that I’ll find someone if I actually tried searching. He knows that I won’t go on my own will, so for the past few years he’s been tricking me into dates.”

“Well I hope I’m not too disappointing,” Yuto mumbled. He was feeling very, very awkward and kind of murderous towards Jinho. He couldn’t wait until tomorrow night when they would be working together.

Hongseok must have seen the dejected look on Yuto’s face because he sighed. “Wait up. Look, er, Yuto right?” Yuto nodded. “Don’t feel bad about this. I’m not angry towards you. It’s Jinho that I want to kill. On his behalf, I’m sorry about this situation.”

“It’s okay. I mean I’d be happy to assist you in his murder,” Yuto replied, and Hongseok laughed, smiling for the first time since their encounter. His eyes glinted with a mischievous look.

“Hey, you’re not so bad. You aren't my type, but I like your attitude. Also, it doesn’t hurt that you’re good-looking,” Hongseok said, reaching for the note in his hand. Yuto didn’t know whether he should be feeling pleased or not by his comments. “Wait, what’s this?” He turned the note around and pulled off two tickets. “Looks like Jinho prepared us a dinner reservation. It’s paid too.”

“Really?” Yuto perked up. Well, at least things were finally improving. “What kind of food?” He had been nervous since he woke up this morning, so the only thing he had for the day was a coffee and rice ball.

“I don’t know, I haven’t been here. I don't know what kind of food they would serve at a place called 'Pretty Pretty,'” Hongseok replied, frowning.

“Pretty Pretty?” Yuto eyes widened. “Um, the one located nearby here?”

“Yeah, just five minutes away,” Hongseok checked. “So you’ve been here before?”

“Uh yeah, I know someone who works there,” Yuto said, checking his watch. It was 7:10 pm. Kino would have finished his shift by now, right? “Um, do we have to go there?”

“Well, why not? It’s free food. Unless you don’t want to go with me,” Hongseok said casually, but Yuto could tell that he was serious.

“No, that’s not it,” Yuto quickly said, smiling automatically. Handsome as he was, Hongseok was a little scary. “I would love to have dinner with you. Let’s get going,” he said, getting up. For most of the walk to the restaurant, except for a couple of polite exchanges, the two of them were quiet. During that time, Yuto wondered what he was getting himself into and whether he should just escape while he could or continue this mess anyways.

“So why did you accept this date?” Hongseok asked suddenly, and Yuto looked at him in surprise. “I mean, you probably knew about it right? Considering you didn’t seem surprised when you saw me.”

Obviously, Jinho hadn’t told Hongseok about Yuto’s reason, which he was grateful for. “I just wanted to go on a date,” Yuto told him.

“You haven’t been on a date before?” Hongseok smirked.

“Not with a guy before,” Yuto admitted, and Hongseok glanced at him curiously. They were reaching the restaurant soon, Yuto knew this path far too well. He had walked down this street a hundred of times, sometimes with Wooseok and other times only with Kino. Sometimes he’d walk to the restaurant after Kino’s shift ended because the street wasn't the safest at night and who knew what kind of creep would be around. During their walk home, Kino would tell him about all the different types of customers that ate at the restaurant that night, funny stories which made Yuto hide his laugh behind his hand and Kino burst into giggles. Sometimes they would stop by Poison to grab a sundae, and sit on the benches talking about what they would do once they graduated. Yuto never realised until now, but a lot of his fondest memories had been with Kino.

“Well, how come you haven’t dated a guy before?” Hongseok stopped to leaned into Yuto and he stepped back quickly, alarmed. Hongseok laughed at his response. “So this is your first time, huh? I guess I should feel kind of special… or am I your experiment?”

“Well I don’t think it sounds very nice that way,” Yuto mumbled, embarrassed. Now that Hongseok put it that way, he felt kind of sorry for using him like this. What kind of benefit was Hongseok getting from this date? A free meal, sure, but nothing else.

“Well, you’re in luck,” Hongseok smiled, stepping closer to him until Yuto could feel his breath on his cheek. “Because I wouldn’t mind being your experiment.”

“H-huh?” Yuto grew very still. He didn’t know how to respond back to Hongseok, because he couldn't tell what kind of game he was playing.

Hongseok’s warm breath blew into his ears as he whispered, “I can teach you a lot of things about being with a guy if that’s what you need.”

It seemed likely that Hongseok was just teasing him, making fun of the fact that he was on his first date with a guy, but he couldn’t help but shiver a little. “I don’t-”

He was cut short when he felt Hongseok’s lips peck the side of Yuto’s right cheek. Hongseok leaned back, grinning at the expression on Yuto’s face. “Hey Yuto, you’re pretty cute when you’re flustered like that. You should do that more often.”

Yuto was about to tell him a couple of explicit, not-so-cute words which he saved only for special occasions when he heard someone calling his name to his left. “Is that you, Yuto?”

He turned around, and his stomach flipped when he saw Kino in the alleyway, dressed in his waiter uniform, staring at the two of them with his mouth shaped in a small oval. This date was not going how he thought it would, not at all.


	7. Small world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A date where Yuto realises that Hongseok isn't as he seems, and that the two of them are a lot more similar than they'd thought.

There was a time when Wooseok and Yuto had been 14 years old, full of energy and curiosity about anything which seemed intriguing. So when Wooseok discovered a USB in the lost property box at school one day, he decided to 'borrow it' to see what was inside it. After school, Yuto and Wooseok sat down at the computer and inserted in the USB. A file popped up on the screen, and just as Wooseok decided to click on it, his mother came into their room.

“Boys, I’ve made you some food-” his mother stopped as a video started playing on the computer. All of them had frozen at the same time; Wooseok’s mother staring at the computer screen while Yuto and Wooseok looked up at her with wide eyes and blank minds. Still to this day, Yuto could recall the specific expression that Wooseok’s mother had made. He would never forget the day Wooseok’s mother caught them accidentally watching porn. Despite Wooseok insisting to his mother that it was a genuine mistake, for the next month his father would call up from overseas (where he worked and lived for most of the time) and give him short sex education talks over the phone. Every single time his father called, Wooseok would moan and repeat "Yes dad," and "I know dad" for the entire phone call. Thank goodness Wooseok's mother hadn't told his own mother, or he probably would have gotten the same treatment.

When he looked at Kino right now, he felt the same sense of embarrassment and shame as he did that day. Kino looked a little surprised, but he didn't show any signs of shock. Still, Yuto could feel his face flush deeply, and he was pretty sure that all of his emotions were on display in plain sight for everyone to see. It didn't help that Kino's hair was gelled up today, so his forehead was revealed. Although Kino usually had his hair down, on rare days he would decide to put up his hair. This was usually when Kino's bed hair was so bad that he was forced to style it. He knew that Kino had a small complex about his prominent facial features, which was the reason why Kino usually let his hair grow so it would 'hide' his face. Yuto was always surprised by how unconfident Kino was of his appearance. If he could, he'd probably stare at his face for longer than necessary. It wasn't because Kino was the best-looking person he knew, but every time Yuto saw him it seemed as if he saw a new and different charm about Kino. For example, right now Yuto could see how Kino's broad forehead gave him a more mature and masculine appearance and seeing Kino smile at him with that look made him want to reach out and stroke his face. Instead, he decided to stay where he was, a reasonable distance away from him.

“Hi Kino,” Yuto replied faintly, waving at him. He didn't know how long Kino had been standing there, but he prayed that he hadn't seen Hongseok kiss him on the cheek. There was something about being kissed in front of your best friend which just felt wrong. It was even worse when your best friend was also the person you had a crush on.

“Oh, so it is you, Yuto!” Kino smiled, waving back at him. “I couldn’t tell from the-“ he gestured to Yuto's hair and clothes. “It’s different from your usual look.”

“Um yeah, just trying new things out,” Yuto replied. Wasn’t that the same thing he had said to Wooseok earlier? Why did he keep saying that when everyone knew he hated trying new things? “How come you're still working? I thought you would have finished work by now.”

“Well when you said you were too busy to meet up tonight, I told Hui that I could work longer,” Kino told him, and now he was staring behind Yuto. “Oh! What are you guys doing together?”

Yuto looked behind, and Hongseok was smiling. “Well Yuto, I didn’t know you were acquaintances with Kino. I guess he's the person you know who works at Pretty Pretty?"

Yuto eyes widened. “Yeah, we’re friends... Do you guys know each other?”

“Kino and I’ve been in the same group for an assignment,” Hongseok told him. “I’m a business major, but I’ve taken a couple of law papers before. It's a pleasant surprise to see you again Kino,” Hongseok walked to him, giving his hand to shake.

Kino was still staring at the two of them but now it was in bemusement, and he shook his hand. “Yeah, it's been a while hasn't it? It's good to see you again! I mean it's so interesting that you and Yuto know each other as well! I never knew you were Yuto's friend. Oh!” Kino exclaimed and clapped his hands together. "Is Hongseok the person you said you were meeting today?"

"Um yeah," Yuto nervously replied. He hoped that Kino wouldn't-

“What was it for again, a project?” Kino asked, his nose scrunching up in concentration.

'Great,' Yuto thought as he looked over at Hongseok, who raised his eyebrow slightly. ‘Please don't ask and just play along,’ Yuto willed to himself.

Luckily Hongseok must have noticed Yuto's discomfort, because he just nodded and repeated, "yeah, for our project."

The three of them stood there for a moment, and suddenly Yuto could see the humour behind the current situation. There was Kino, who was Yuto's best friend and somehow acquainted with Hongseok. Hongseok himself had only found out that he was on a date with Yuto an hour ago and was now pretending that he wasn't. Finally, while Yuto was falling for Kino, he was currently on a date with someone else. It would have been amusing if it wasn't himself in this scenario.

"Well I better head back to work," Kino jumped as if he finally remembered that he was still on his shift. "I was throwing away the rubbish when I meet you guys. I've been gone for a while now, so people at work might be wondering where I am."

"Well we're on our way to Pretty Pretty too," Hongseok told him. "We can walk with you then and catch up a little."

"Oh really? That’s awesome," Kino smiled, and the three of them started to walk down the street again. "So, how long have you guys known each other?"

"Not long," Yuto answered truthfully. Well, Kino hadn't asked for a specific period, so it was alright. "We met through a co-worker of mine."

"Oh really? So, what's this project about? You've been so secretive about it," Kino whined and pushed Yuto jokingly. "I thought that we didn't keep secrets from each other!"

Oh Kino, if you only knew."Oh, it's nothing major," Yuto said dismissively, but Yuto pushed him again, this time a little harder.

"Come on! Fine, if you won't tell me, then I'll ask Hongseok," Kino pouted. He smiled at Hongseok, who looked caught off guard for a brief moment. "Hongseok?"

Yuto had no idea what Hongseok was going to say, but he didn't expect him to say what he did. "Gymming. My friend told me that Yuto's been interested in gaining some muscle, and I work as a personal trainer when I'm not studying." Hongseok said this all in a calm and smooth tone, as if they had been planning this all along. Yuto nodded, but secretly he was admiring how skillfully Hongseok had lied. While Yuto preferred being honest, there were definitely times where telling lies had its merits.

"Oh, I didn't know that you wanted to do that," Kino said, squeezing Yuto's biceps suddenly. "But you're already quite toned! Look, try to feel him." He grabbed Hongseok's hand and placed it on Yuto's chest.

"Kino, stop it," Yuto blushed. "That was in high school, while I was still playing baseball. I haven't been exercising these days, so I don't have as much muscle as I used to."

"What about all that running you've been doing then?"

Yuto stared at him. "How do you know about that?"

"Wooseok told me," Kino replied, and Yuto was genuinely shocked by how observant Wooseok had been. He swore that whenever he had come back from running in the morning, Wooseok had been fast asleep. Yuto wondered if Wooseok had noticed anything else the past few weeks, and decided he should be more careful in the future.

Suddenly, Hongseok rubbed his fingers across Yuto's chest. "Hey, you're not bad though. If you pick things up now, you could easily gain muscle easily. I mean you've got the build for it too." Yuto slapped his hands off, giving him an embarrassed look.

"You should see his thigh muscle actually," Kino gasped, and Yuto quickly grabbed his wrists before he could do anymore touching. While he wouldn't mind it, he knew it wasn't wise. Skin to skin contact with Kino still made Yuto's mind a little fuzzy, and the rational part of his brain became less so and instead more impulsive, which he knew currently was not a good idea.

"Stop it, Kino," Yuto ordered him, and Kino sighed, although he managed to sneak in a poke at Yuto's waist. Yuto turned to say something to Hongseok but stopped when he saw him staring at him with a strange look. "What?"

"The two of you are quite close, aren't you?" Hongseok commented, with a tint of amusement. "Almost like brothers or something else."

"Of course, Yuto is my favourite person," Kino grinned. Even though Yuto knew that he wasn't, he couldn't help but still feel giddy.

"No, I'm not. What are your parents going to say if they hear this?" He scolded, pretending to hit Kino on the head.

"Apart from them, silly!"

"Well, what about Wooseok?" Yuto wouldn't be surprised if Kino considered himself to be closer to Wooseok, as they had known each other for longer. But Kino looked at him and gave him a wink, giving him the 'shhhh' gesture. Trying his best to ignore how adorable Kino was being, Yuto asked, "Okay, then what about Hui?"

At the mention of the name, Kino dropped his hand, and his eyes widened. "Hui? Oh no!" They were almost at Pretty Pretty now, but Kino started to run towards the restaurant with a frantic expression. "I have to go, I forgot to do something for Hui! He's going to tell me off so much. Sorry, Yuto and Hongseok, I'll see you guys later!" He gave them a quick wave, before sprinting off.

"Well, what on earth was that about?" Hongseok asked when Kino was out of their view.

"He probably forgot to run an errand or something," Yuto replied. Now that it was the two of them again, he remembered that they were currently on a date. For some reason, talking to Kino had made him forget that.

"Not Kino, I mean your lies. You didn't tell him that you were going on a date today?" Hongseok shook his head, sighing. "You put me in a sticky situation. I had no idea what this project thing was and had to make up something on the spot."

"I'm sorry," Yuto pleaded. "I'll make it up to you next time, so thank you so much."

"Well it's okay, I assumed you had your reasons," Hongseok replied gruffly. They were inside Pretty Pretty now, and the waiter seated them at a table located next to the windows. Opening their menus, the two of them spent some time discussing the menu and ordered their meals before continuing their conversation.

"Oh yeah, why did you kiss me earlier? That was not necessary," Yuto grumbled, recalling the moment.

"What are you, 10-years-old?" Hongseok scoffed. "Also it was only a peck on the cheek. Don't tell me you haven't kissed someone before either, or I'll start asking you if you have to be home before midnight like a princess."

"Haha, very funny," Yuto pretended to applaud him. "Still, I don't want you to just suddenly kiss me like that. I've only known you for like an hour."

"Who cares? I mean why are you so flustered about just a small kiss? I do more than that with my nephews."

"Well next time warn me," Yuto said, then shook his head. "Not that there will be a next time, just... if you're going to kiss someone one day randomly, just stop and maybe warn the person. Or consider whether it's a good idea."

"Whatever," Hongseok rolled his eyes as he sipped his red wine. "You know, you look older than me, but you're like a baby sheep. I don't know if it's cute or frustrating to watch."

"Hey Hongseok," Yuto sighed. "I've been wondering. Why are you still on this date with me? If you can call it a date."

Hongseok pondered this question for a moment, then pointed at the plate of food which the waitress was bringing over. "The fact that we're getting a free meal out of this?"

"Seriously, is that it?"

"I thought you were the one that wanted to go on this date first, not me. Isn't the fact that you're on this date enough?"

"I just feel bad," Yuto mumbled as he began to cut up his steak. "Because you're on this date knowing that I don't have any serious intentions. I feel like I'm taking advantage of you."

"Well that's good to hear because I don't have any thought of dating you either," Hongseok said, and then laughed when he saw Yuto's face. "What? You basically said the same thing as what I just said. I mean it's not that I don't like you. You actually seem like an interesting person, but I'm not looking to be in a relationship right now. In fact, I think you and I are here for similar reasons. So just relax and let's enjoy this lovely food and atmosphere."

Similar reasons? Apart from telling him that this was his first date with a guy, Yuto hadn't even told him why he was on this date in the first place. He didn't know what Hongseok thought the reason was, but he just nodded. The two of them spent the next thirty minutes eating their meals, which Yuto found very satisfactory after eating his first proper meal in hours. He got his regular at Pretty Pretty, which was the steak and fries. After Yuto's recommendation, Hongseok had gotten the seafood creamy pasta which luckily he enjoyed a lot. Once they finished their meal, Hongseok insisted that they have a drink, despite Yuto's multiple refusals. He knew that Kino was still working, having seen his occasionally around the restaurant, so he didn't want to do anything troublesome from the alcohol. While Yuto didn't have any _terrible_ alcohol habits, it made him more inhibited and he could recall certain drunk scenarios which he regretted. Wooseok still had multiple videos of him dancing to girl group songs, which he kept to blackmail him. This was the main reason why Yuto only ever drank out with Kino or Wooseok, as they knew how to handle him. Since it was the first time being with Hongseok, he thought it would be wise to avoid getting drunk.

"You know, there is actually another reason why I'm still here with you," Hongseok said as he poured himself another glass of soju and beer. Although Yuto had decided to stop after drinking two glasses, Hongseok was still going strong. "Initially I thought that we were nothing alike, both in appearance and personality. But after talking to and being with you, I realised that strangely there's a part of you that reminds me of my past self."

"Really?" Yuto was surprised. Like Hongseok said, he also thought that there was nothing similar about the two of them. Not in a bad way, but they just seemed to be two different entities. "How come?"

"Well, this is your first date with a guy right? I know you haven't told me anything, but from your words and behaviour it feels like you're struggling with something. Maybe you have someone you like right now?" Hongseok suddenly directed his gaze onto Yuto with such a force that he wanted to look away.

How on earth had he picked that up? Had Jinho told him anything? He didn't think so, but he wasn't sure. Yuto wasn't sure how he wanted to respond back. He was able to tell Jinho because he was someone who Yuto could trust and seemed reliable. Plus, he didn’t know Kino personally. On the other hand, Hongseok knew who Kino was. He was also good friends (or whatever) with Jinho, which meant that there was a high possibility that Hongseok could tell Jinho who Yuto liked. In fact, there was a risk that Hongseok would directly tell Kino or do something that would make Kino suspicious. Regardless of whether Yuto's feelings for Kino were genuine or just purely physical, he didn't want to ruin his friendship with him. From all the confusion, the only thing Yuto was certain about was that Kino was his top priority.

As if reading Yuto's uncertainty, Hongseok told him, "look, you don't have to tell me who you like. Technically you can even deny that you like someone, although I have a pretty good gut feeling that you do. But if you be a little bit honest with me, I can try to help you with what you're experiencing. It might not work, but I can try."

Yuto blinked, touched by the sincerity in Hongseok's words. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to open up a little. “Well, it’s nothing serious. Just one day, for the first time, I found myself attracted to... this guy, and I wanted to see whether it was a one-off or if I found other men attractive as well. I guess since then, I've been feeling a little bit uncertain about who I am."

"I can definitely relate to that," Hongseok sighed and tipped the rest of his drink down his throat. "I think everyone has that moment when they feel an attraction towards someone they didn't expect to. So how do you respond to it? Do you try to explore those feelings, to see where they lead you, or instead ignore and bury them deep down inside of yourself?"

Yuto didn't respond.

“Well, I chose to do the later” Hongseok replied to his own question. “Unlike you, I've always been attracted to guys only. I mean, not once in my life have I been physically attracted to a girl. I don't know what you think about physical attraction compared to emotional attraction, but for me, both aspects are as important in a relationship. But until I was in university, I persuaded myself that I liked girls. At the time I didn't have any friends who were also gay or would understand, and my family was a little... conservative I guess." At the mention of his family, Hongseok poured himself another glass and Yuto also decided to do the same. It seemed like he would need it for the upcoming talk.

"So then what happened? What changed?"

"I used to only go out with girls. None of my relationships were serious, but I wanted to prove to myself that I could be with a girl. So yeah, it wasn’t until my last girlfriend cheated on me that I got a hold of myself and was truly honest about my sexuality.”

“O-oh, I’m sorry to hear about that," Yuto stammered.

“Nah don’t be,” Hongseok laughed. "That experience was like an epiphany for me. I realised that there was no point in being cheated on by someone I didn’t even like. So I'm grateful that it happened actually. I mean, that’s how I became friends with Jinho.”

Yuto lowered his glass. “What do you mean?”

“Well while I was still dating that girl, I got a text one day from someone asking me if I was Yang Hongseok. I wasn’t stupid enough to reply back, but the next day I went over to the girl’s house and standing outside was this boy. Jinho looked even younger back then, I thought I was older than him. He took one look at the girl and me, and then he punched me.” Hongseok tilted his head upwards and pointed to his jaw, where there was a tiny silver scar shaped like a crescent. “He didn’t actually punch me very well but see this? He happened to be wearing a ring at the time, so I got a small scratch, nothing big. Jinho still feels bad about it, but I don’t care. I mean, you should have seen the state he was in when he found out about me.”

Yuto stared at Hongseok in shock. “You mean you and Jinho were dating the same girl?”

“Yeah, for almost a year for me and maybe three years for Jinho ?” Hongseok smiled as if remembering a pleasant memory instead of a breakup. “I mean I was fine with everything because I already knew that the girl was dating another guy, I just didn’t really care. Also like I said, I didn’t like girls. But Jinho on the other hand, man I think she was his first love. After he punched me, the girl broke up with him and he wasn’t even mad at her! At the time I felt kind of bad because it was kind of my fault in some ways. Like the girl was trouble, but I wasn’t helping. So I offered to take Jinho out for a drink, but it took a couple of months for him to say yes. I think he hated me for a while.”

Yuto was still shocked, so he didn’t know what to say. Who on earth offered to go drinking with the guy your girlfriend was cheating on you with? “Well that kind of seems like a bad memory, at least to me. How come it isn’t for you?"

“Because thanks to that event, for the first time I stopped lying to myself. Jinho was the first person I ever told that I was gay. He didn't even know me well, yet he was the only person who just accepted it as if it was nothing. He may be annoying sometimes, but he has a good heart.” Hongseok grimaced. “Did I get too soft for a moment?"

"No, I'm just surprised you even told me that about yourself. Thank you," Yuto told him.

"Yeah well, I'm just letting you know that it's okay if you feel confused. Don't be timid and do nothing about it, as I did. It's good that you decided to go on this date. Jinho probably recommended it to you right? Except he didn't have to drag me into it too..." the last part was grumbled by Hongseok. "Hey, do you have anyone close to you who can support you?"

"Uh..." he thought about Kino and Wooseok. "Kind of. It's no biggie though, I really mean it."

"Well you say that, but I don't think so. I can recognise that look you have," Hongseok said softly, and he looked wistful for a moment.

"What look?" Yuto asked.

"Of longing for something you can't have."

Ouch.

"Hey kid, I think I'm done for tonight." Hongseok drank the remaining sip of his glass."Ah, that last sip of soju is always bittersweet. Here, give me your phone." Yuto did as he said, and Hongseok tapped something into it before giving back his phone. "There, I saved my details if you want to talk to someone. Or if you want to build up your muscles, because I really am a part-time personal trainer."

"Thank you. For everything today. It was a nice er, date," Yuto smiled. "Do you want me to help you get home?"

"Nah I should be fine. I've barely drunk anything, I can grab a taxi or crash at Jinho's place since he lives nearby. Maybe I'll do that actually, he owes me something after today. You should see if Kino's almost finished with his shift and go back home with him."

"Oh, I think I'm okay actually," Yuto quickly said. He hadn't walked back home with Kino since that night, and he suddenly felt his palms go sweaty at the thought of the two of them walking together alone.

"No you should, for both of your safety," Hongseok said firmly. Seeing Kino walked nearby, Hongseok waved him over to their table. "Hey, Kino!"

"Hey, how was everything?" Kino asked, then his eyes widened at the empty glasses of beer and soju left on the table. "Oh wow, you guys have had quite a bit."

"That was mostly Hongseok's doing," Yuto confirmed to him.

"But still, Yuto had some as well. Hey Kino, when do you finish your shift?"

Kino looked at his watch. "Uh, by the end of this hour?"

"Good, can you make sure Yuto goes home well? Since he's had some alcohol, it would be good to make sure." Hongseok got up, and then said, "I'll just go to the toilet."

"Uh yeah sure," Yuto told him, then said to Kino, "You don't have to take me home, I really haven't had much to drink tonight."

"Nah it's fine, I finish soon anyways. Hold up, I'll ask Hui if I can finish up earlier," Kino grinned and before Yuto could say no, he had already left. Yuto sighed. Why did it seem like no one listened to him when he said no?

"Hey Yuto, I think I'm going to head out first. If I want to sleep over at Jinho's, I better get there before he's asleep. He won't be too pleased if I make a racket outside of his flat," Hongseok said when he came back. "I've paid for the drinks so don't worry."

"What, you didn't have to do that!" Yuto exclaimed because he knew how expensive it would have cost, especially for a student.

"It's okay, I'm older than you. Besides, I drank most of everything. Remember, text me if you need someone to talk to alright? I'm happy for you to do that. This was a nice date," Hongseok smiled, reminding Yuto of how handsome he was. "See you later," he said and then gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before he left.

Yuto brushed the side of his face. Although Yuto didn't have any attraction towards Hongseok, he had to admit that he was charming. Also, he seemed like a decent person. He looked down to see Hongseok's contact details saved on his phone as 'Hongseok the handsome'. He snorted.

"What's so funny? Kino asked from behind. Yuto saw that he had taken his tie off and unbutton the top two buttons of his shirt.

"Nothing. What did Hui say?"

"Not a problem, he said I could leave early," Kino stretched his arms, and sighed with relief. "Ah, I could do with some ice cream. Want to stop by the supermarket on the way home?"

"Sure," Yuto smiled and the two of them started walking out of the restaurant. "Besides, I need to buy some toilet paper."

 

\-------------------

 

"Did you really have to crash over at mine tonight?" Jinho grumbled as he chucked his extra blanket and pillow at Hongseok. He was currently lying on the floor of Jinho's room, with his arms and legs spread out. Hongseok hadn't bothered to get changed, so he was still in the same outfit.

"Ah I'm too tired," Hongseok mumbled.

"Or at least notify me before you come over," Jinho groaned, but he still helped Hongseok take his socks and jacket off. "So what did you think about your date?"

"He seems nice," Hongseok commented, thinking of Yuto's blushing face and his shy demeanor that contrasted his chic appearance. He also remembered the way he looked at Kino, and the multiple times he stole a glance at him when he thought no one was looking. It was so subtle, yet obvious in Hongseok's eyes. Obvious, because he had done the same things before.

"Well would you go on a date with him again? I like him," Jinho grinned.

"I'm not going to go out with him just because you like him," Hongseok kicked Jinho lightly.

"You didn't answer my question," Jinho sang.

"I don't know, we'll see." Hongseok told him, and Jinho whooped, standing up to dance in celebration.

"You know that's the first time you haven't said you hated the person I picked for you," Jinho said gleefully. "I think you do like him! You rascal."

Jinho, you can be really clueless sometimes. "I'm going to sleep," Hongseok grunted, and he pulled his shirt off himself. "Goodnight, don't wake me up in the morning."

"Fine," Jinho huffed, and Hongseok smiled while closing his eyes.

Sometimes you didn't need what you wanted most to be happy. That had taken him some time to learn, but he didn't have any regrets now. Not at all, he told himself. But he hoped for the sakes of Yuto that it would take him less time and heartbreak to realise that. Or, that things would turn out differently for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took longer, I had some other stuff to do and this chapter was difficult to write up! I kept re-writing stuff, so sorry if there are any mistakes. I'll probably edit it again at some point to see if I have made any.
> 
> Also! This is the first time that I had someone else's perspective/point of view in the story. Let me know if you think more of that would be interesting~ Otherwise I hope you enjoy :)


	8. Complicated emotions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuto feels courageous and asks Kino a question, which ends with an unexpected answer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unlike the previous chapter, I got inspiration really quickly which is why this chapter is already up haha! Also sorry for the sadness in this chapter :(

They were walking back to Yuto's place, Kino licking on his Melona ice cream while he carried a 24 pack of toilet rolls, when Yuto realised that he didn't know if Kino had ever been on a date. Actually, thinking about it now, Kino had never been in a relationship (unless it had been a secret). He tried to remember any moments of Kino telling him about a crush, but he couldn't. For every year in high school, Kino had given everyone hand-made pink heart cards on Valentine's day. When it was Easter, he hid hundreds of chocolate eggs around the school. During the Christmas season, he baked cookies for everyone in his classroom to have. However, Yuto couldn't remember Kino ever returning any of the confessions he received, although he was very kind and gentle towards the people who did. Kino never told Yuto about a particular person who made them feel strange inside, or gave him butterflies. It had never bothered him until now, but then again all three of them had never really been interested in their individual personal relationships. Like how they never asked Wooseok about his random disappearances or Yuto's ex-girlfriends, none of them discussed the lack of romance in Kino's life. 

"Hey Kino," Yuto said, and Kino looked up at him mid-lick. 

"What's up?" 

"This might be a strange question, but... have you ever gone on a date with someone?"

Kino continued to dart his tongue around the ice cream while he thought. After a minute, he replied, "no, I don't think so. How come?"

"Uh, I was just wondering." They continued to walk and for a while, it was silent between the two. 

"I mean you know that I've had someone on my mind for a while, but I haven't really thought about going on a date. Why would I, when it can't be with the right person?" 

Yuto stopped moving. "Huh?" 

"Oh don't you know? Maybe you didn't hear it from Wooseok," Kino didn't look at him while he was saying this. "Hui's got a new boyfriend, called Edawn. I think they met at a flower shop where Edawn works, it's a really cute story. I've met him as well, he's really funny and quirky, kind of the opposite of Hui. But they match each other really well. I mean you should see the way Hui looks at him, you can tell it's love. Hey, are you going to stand there all night?"

"What? Oh yeah," Yuto forced himself to jog next to Kino, but he still felt numb. Even his brain felt as if it had stopped functioning because he still couldn't really understand what Kino had said. There was someone that Kino liked? And Yuto knew about it?

"But you guys know that it wasn't anything serious to begin with. I never thought we would be in a relationship, I'm just happy with being a part of his life. So you don't have to feel bad for me, okay?" Kino finally looked at him and he was smiling. There was a sadness to it that Yuto had rarely seen, but it was a genuine smile. Yuto still didn't know what to feel, his chest felt tight and his mind was still blank, but his hand automatically reached for Kino's head to pat him. 

Kino blinked a couple of times, then quickly took a step back so that Yuto's hand fell off his head and dropped down to his side. "Oh look, we're already at your flat. Say hi to Wooseok for me, well goodnight!" He turned around before Yuto could say anything, and was jogging in the direction of his dorm. Yuto could have called back, told him it was okay to cry, but his mouth wouldn't obey. Instead, he just stared at the back of Kino's figure, which looked so small right now. He could see that he was still carrying his unfinished ice cream as he jogged, and Yuto didn't know whether he wanted to laugh or cry at the sight. 

Finally, after what seemed like hours past, he entered his flat. Normally he would wash up, but he fell on top of his bed the moment he walked into his room. Tomorrow, he would deal with the consequences. For tonight, he just wanted to sleep. 

 

\-----------------

When he woke up the next day, he instantly remembered his conversation last night with Kino. When he ate breakfast, he wondered how long Kino had liked Hui. While he was doing the housework, folding up the laundry, Yuto recalled all the moments Kino had talked about Hui. Before he went to sleep, he thought about the reasons why Kino liked Hui and not himself. On Sunday, Kino and Yuto had plans but Kino sent him an apology through text, saying that someone had gotten sick at work so he needed to cover their shift last minute. So he was at home as usual with Wooseok, who was doing some study. Finally, he couldn't bear it any longer. 

"Wooseok, I need to ask you something." Wooseok didn't respond and Yuto guessed it was because of his music, which even Yuto could hear buzzing from his earphones. So Yuto kicked Wooseok's ankle, and he yelped. 

"What is wrong with you?" he yelled, pulling out his earphones and glaring at Yuto.

"You know that if you listen to music that loud, you're going to go deaf by the time you're fourty."

"Whatever, I hope you didn't kick me just to say that. What's going on, you've been looking constipated since your date on Friday. I thought it went well."

"Yeah it did but it's not about that. Do you know if Kino's ever liked someone?"

Wooseok narrowed his eyes. "Why?"

"Just answer my question. Do you?"

"Well yeah, it's pretty obvious." 

"Do you know who it is?" Yuto stared at him and Wooseok rolled his eyes.

"Of course you dimwit. How could I not?"

Yuto sat up. "How come Kino never told me?"

"Just because Kino didn't tell you who he liked doesn't mean he never liked anyone. He didn't tell me either, but I could tell. Like I said, it was obvious." Wooseok saw the expression on Yuto's face and laughed. "Don't tell me you didn't know. Please."

"I just found out a couple of days ago!" Yuto exclaimed, then whispered, "Is it really... Hui?"

"No shit, you idiot. I can't believe you didn't know all this time, are you even his friend? Why else would Kino always talk about Hui in high school, how he was so awesome, mature, clever, etc etc. I knew you were naive, but not to this extent." Wooseok punched him lightly on the arm. 

"I thought that Kino _respected_ Hui. How was I supposed to know that he had feelings for him too?" Yuto mumbled. "I mean even you always say how cool Hui is. I thought he was like an older brother or something."

"Well, I guess it started off like that. You know that Kino's always loved Hui since we were younger. But seriously, how could you not notice? I thought you knew all this time and it was just an unspoken rule to not talk about it because we knew it would never go anywhere. I mean, Hui would never see him as anything but a younger brother." 

Yuto felt awful. "Really? I honestly didn't know. I only found out when Kino told me indirectly on Friday." 

"What really? You made Kino say that? That's rough, he's probably still sore from Hui and Edawn," Wooseok stared at Yuto in pity and mild disgust. "You know that's the reason why he got so drunk a couple of weeks ago right? That was the day when he found out about them."

Now Yuto felt sick. "Really?"

"Yeah, I feel bad for him. Edawn is really cool and likable. It would be easier if he was the opposite, but what can you do? I mean I'm happy for Hui because he's really happy right now and I'm sure Kino feels the same way."

"So you think Kino still likes him?"

"Who knows. Maybe he hasn't for a while, or maybe he always will have some feelings towards him. It's hard to tell and it's complicated, which is why I don't ask him about it."

"Well wouldn't it help if we did talk to him?" Yuto asked.

"You can try if you like, but I'd rather not add heat to the wound. Your choice," Wooseok replied dryly. "Hey, are you feeling okay? You really don't look well lately."

Was it obvious? While Yuto felt empathetic towards Kino, he couldn't deny that there was this indescribable monster inside of him that screeched each time he thought of Kino and Hui. Hui. He'd always thought fondly of the older man, but now his name left the taste of sour milk in his mouth. He knew he was being unfair, especially because Hui was a good guy, Yuto knew that from his own experience. But it didn't mean that he wasn't jealous and a little hateful of him right now. 

"I'm alright, I just feel like a bad friend," Yuto sighed. Wooseok didn't even know the worst of it. "Hey, do you want to go see Kino with me after he finishes work?"

"Can no do, sorry. I've got plans tonight," Wooseok replied, putting his earphones back in. "I'm going out to a concert." 

"On a sunday night?" 

"Yeah, one of my favourite bands are coming in. Also, don't wait up for me tonight," Wooseok gave him a look and Yuto understood. 

"Hey, you'll look after yourself right?" Yuto asked carefully. 

"Of course." Wooseok nodded but he wasn't looking at Yuto anymore, instead, picking up from where he was studying before. Yuto wanted to say more, like ask him what kind of people he hung out with at these concerts, especially afterward, but he knew that it was the end of the topic. Instead, he opened his laptop and began to do his own work. 

\------------------------------------

Ten minutes before 9 pm, Yuto sent a text to Kino. _I'll walk you home today, wait for me once your shift finishes._ Even though he was still nervous about being with Kino, he wanted to make sure that he was alright after Friday night. While it hurt to think that Kino liked someone, he felt sorry for him. Not once had Kino confided in him or Wooseok about his feelings for Hui. How many years had he kept his emotions to himself? The thought of Kino smiling to cover his true feelings made his heartache. He might like Kino, but he was his friend first and foremost. He wanted to be a good friend for Kino, which meant that he would have to simply ignore his own feelings of jealousy and move on from it. 

He was wearing a black v-neck shirt, but he knew it would be cold outside so he put on a navy oversized hoodie and a decent pair of sweatpants. Yuto took a look in the mirror and grumbled at the sight. He looked like he was losing weight, his face appearing more gaunt than usual. Maybe he would take up the gym offer from Hongseok. 

Chucking on a pair of sneakers, he made sure the door was locked before leaving to go to Pretty Pretty. Wooseok had left earlier, so Yuto was the last one to leave the flat. He had been pretty mysterious about this whole concert, and when Yuto asked who he was going with, Wooseok told him he wouldn't know who they were anyway. So the most Yuto could do was to plead Wooseok to keep his phone sound on and not on silent like he normally did.

He arrived at the restaurant ten minutes later, hands in the pocket of his hoodie to keep them warm from the cold breeze of the night. He checked the time on his phone and saw that it was five minutes past 9 pm but since Kino still hadn't replied back to his text yet, it probably meant that he was still working. Yuto decided to wait at the brick wall beside the restaurant, which was normally where he waited for Kino. As he approached it, he saw he wasn't the only one waiting for someone tonight. 

"Hey," the man nodded at Yuto. He was shorter than him, with messy, dirty blonde hair that covered his light brown eyes. His outfit was rather interesting. He was wearing a pair of overalls which were made from different materials of denim all patched up together and a rainbow-striped sweater underneath. There were flowers tucked behind his ear, poking out of one of his pockets, even inside one of his shoes. He was striking.

"Hey," Yuto nodded back at him. He leaned on the wall and felt the uncomfortable stare of the man linger over himself. He tried to ignore it by looking down at his feet. 

"You waiting for someone?" the man asked.

"Yeah, you?"

"My boyfriend." the man smiled. "He works at the restaurant over there," he said, pointing over to where Pretty Pretty was.

It was then that Yuto realised who he was. "Oh, are you Edawn by chance?" 

"Too right I am. You must know Hui then, I swear that guy knows everyone in this area. Mr. Popular," Edawn commented, but he sounded cheerful. 

"Yeah, I'm close to someone he knows. You might know him too, Kino?" 

"Oh yeah, I think I met him a couple of times. Pale, black-haired boy with a cute laugh? Makes you want to hug him and take him home?" Yuto hesitantly nodded and Edawn smirked. "Are you his boyfriend?"

"Er, no," Yuto shook his head quickly, and Edawn sighed.

"Shame for you then, he's adorable. I can see why Hui dotes on him. So what's your name?"

"Adachi Yuto, but it's just Yuto," he said. "So how long have you and Hui been dating?"

"Almost three sweet, wonderful weeks," Edawn smiled, then his expression darkened. "Hui is the best boyfriend possible, except he works too much. I can't believe he even works on a Sunday... Well apart from that he's perfect. When I saw him, I just knew that he was the one missing in my life." 

"Oh, wow," Yuto replied lamely. "What made you believe that?"

"The first time I saw him, he reminded me of daisies. They symbolise new beginnings, and even true love. And guess what? They'e my favourite flower." Edawn leaned in to peer at Yuto closer. He had a look of amusement as he stared at him. "You know what flower you remind me of? Gardenias. Back in the Victorian times, they were used for people to anonymously express feelings of love towards others. So they signify secret love. They also smell really good too." Yuto felt his ears warm at his comment, but luckily Edawn's eyes were now focused on something else. "Hey, I think I see them!" He waved energetically and Yuto saw that his cheeks were rosy, eyes twinkling. "Hui!" 

"Sorry Dawn, hope you didn't have to wait for long." Yuto hadn't seen Hui in a couple of weeks, but he looked different. His cheeks appeared rounder than usual, he had some sort of strange _glow_ to him and he was smiling wider than Yuto had ever seen him. He gave Edawn a kiss, not just on the cheek but full contact to the lips. Behind Hui, Yuto saw Kino look away from them. Hui stepped back from Edawn, smiling now at Yuto. "Oh hey Yuto, it's nice to see you! What are you two doing together?"

"We just met, we were talking about how cute Kino is," Edawn said, wrapping his arms around Kino who blushed. 

"What are you doing here?" Kino asked Yuto, struggling to get out of Edawn's arms. Hui laughed when he saw Kino's expression and ruffled his hair.

"I sent you a text, didn't you see it?" Yuto asked. He didn't know why, but suddenly he felt annoyed. Without thinking, he pulled down on Edawn's arm so that he was no longer around Kino and instead wrapped his own arms around his shoulders. Kino looked up at him, and his face was getting more red. Yuto had no idea where his sudden courage had come from but he didn't budge. Edawn and Hui glanced at each other with mild surprise but didn't say anything.

"U-uh I guess I didn't see it?" Kino stammered, and then he checked his phone quickly. "Oh I'm glad you came by though, sorry about having to cancel our plans earlier. I guess we'll get going. Edawn, it was nice to see you again! Hope you guys get home safely."

"Yeah, you guys too. It was a pleasure meeting you as well, Yuto." Edawn gave Yuto a wink and then wrapped his fingers around Hui's own. They began to walk away, laughing and Hui whispered something intimately in Edawn's ear. They looked good together, a natural fit. Yuto still felt annoyed though. He realised he was still staring at them when Kino coughed. 

"Um Yuto, are you going to keep hugging me?"

Normally, Yuto would have been mortified by now. Yuto knew that he should let go but he didn't want to. He was feeling strangely possessive of Kino right now. "Yeah, in a bit. You look cold," he commented, and it was true. He had goosebumps all down his arms, as he was only dressed in his work shirt and pants. "Don't you have a jacket to wear?" Kino shook his head, and Yuto let go of his grip so that he could pull his hoodie over him. He put it on Kino, who was getting even redder now.

"It's okay, I'm not that cold," Kino started to say but Yuto pinched his nose. "Ouch!"

"Stop being stupid, it's okay. I won't be cold, if you give me a hug right now," Yuto told him while opening his arms out and Kino's eyes, which had been fine until now, started to look moist. "You can also cry if you want," he said softly.

Kino stared at him for a second and then he buried his face inside Yuto's chest while he wrapped his arms tightly around Yuto's waist. He felt Kino's tears against his shirt before he heard the quiet sobs come from him. Yuto just patted the back of his head and pulled him in tighter. While Kino cried, he could feel his own heart breaking at the same time and swore to himself that night that no matter what, he wouldn't make Kino cry.


	9. Unsettled, unstable, unsteady

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The more Yuto learns, the more questions he has. About everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I'm so sorry about the super late post, I've just been really busy with full-time uni work! Originally this chapter was longer, but I decided to cut it shorter and have it for the next chapter. Thank you everyone for the kudos and comments, it's really exciting to know that people read what I write, even though it's imperfect! Also, I had to re-read all the chapters to know exactly what has happened and while I was doing that, I edited some parts. However, there should be no changes to the plot of the story.
> 
> The next chapter should come out by the end of this weekend hopefully, as I am on a roll (I just finished this assignment so am super happy hehe). Just for anyone who is wondering why on earth there is no progression to the relationships in this fic, this will be one of those annoying stories with slow developments (just to torture everyone.... kidding). Still, I hope you guys enjoy reading and please feel free to write comments with feedback! :)

In total, there were three occasions where Yuto had seen Kino cry. 

The first time was when they were fourteen years old, dressed in black suits that didn’t fit properly and still too young to understand the concept of death. Still, they clung onto Kino’s hands, Yuto and Wooseok on either side of him, and squeezed tightly as his teardrops fell on the flowers which lay before the grave of Kino’s father.

There were tears of frustration and anger the second time. Yuto remembered having to pull back Wooseok’s arms behind him so he wouldn’t punch the man who slurred ugly words, yelling at him to ‘go back to your country’ and spat out vile names which burned his ears. At the time, Kino hadn't moved or said anything, but his watering eyes grew blood red as he stared at the man with an expression that Yuto hadn't seen before. He’d bitten his trembling lips, which caused the small blood vessels under the bottom of his lip to burst and left tiny red dots on his skin. Later, Yuto also saw that he’d clenched his hands into fists so tightly that there were nail marks tattooed on the palm of his hands. 

And now he'd seen him cry for the third time. More than seeing it, he could _feel_ how soaked his shirt was, the pressure of Kino’s face rubbed against his chest and the quakes from his trembling body. So when he eventually looked up at him with swollen eyes and asked in a small voice, “can I sleep over at yours tonight?”, Yuto had to say yes.  

That was how he found himself back in his room thirty minutes later, with Kino dressed in one of his clean shirts and shorts. The shirt looked ridiculously oversized on him, almost the same length as the end of his shorts. His hair was still damp from his shower, so Yuto grabbed the towel wrapped around his neck and gently rubbed his hair with it. 

“Are you okay?” Yuto finally asked, and Kino nodded, but he was staring at the ground so he could only see the nape of his neck. They had barely spoken on their way to his flat, but Yuto understood. So, he didn’t mention the previous events and instead asked him, “so are we watching Disney or Pixar?”

One of Kino's favourite pastimes was to watch animated movies. When they were younger, Kino would wake up early in the morning to watch cartoon episodes before school started. During their high school days, Kino wrote a list of movies and then marathoned them as soon as the school break came. Usually, Kino made Wooseok and Yuto watch them with him, which was fine since Wooseok enjoyed anime and Yuto... well he just always enjoyed doing what Kino did. Once they had started university, he didn't watch them as aggressively as before. However, every now and then he still asked Yuto to watch something with him, usually as soon as their break began. As usual, they were lying down on the mattress which Yuto had placed on the ground, snuggled in pillows and a single blanket. It was beginning to get chilly at night, but Yuto knew that Kino heated up while he slept and would wake up sweating if he gave him extra layers of clothes. So to keep warm, Kino huddled into Yuto while he watched his laptop screen with wide, innocent eyes (as if this wasn't his fifth time watching Tarzan). 

At least he was absorbed in the movie, unlike Yuto. He couldn't do anything about Kino lying right next to him, so instead he hadn't moved positions since the beginning of the movie. His back was starting to ache, and he was beginning to lose feeling in his right arm. Yuto wondered if Kino could hear how fast his heart was racing as he lay next to him, see the quick looks he sneaked at him with the corner of his eyes. The smell of fresh citrus, the scent of Yuto's shampoo, lingered on him. His shirt was so loose on Kino that a vast area of his neck and even one of his shoulders was exposed, revealing his milky skin. Yuto closed his eyes, and tried distracting himself by counting down from 100. He told himself that once Kino had fallen asleep, as he usually did in the middle of a movie, he would creep out of the blankets and sleep in his own bed. That was the righteous act to do. But his eyes didn’t open again, and he couldn’t recall the specific moment he fell asleep. All he could vaguely remember before he drifted into his dreams was a whisper of 'goodnight,' and someone tucking him into the blankets.  

When he woke up, it was still dark. Yuto rubbed his eyes, then froze when he heard the same yell which had woken him in the first place. The noise was coming from downstairs, followed by muffled voices. At first, he thought it was a burglar and looked around frantically for a weapon. Just as his eyes caught sight of his old baseball bat, he saw that Kino was also awake and trying to open the door of the room ever so slowly. 

“What are you-“

Kino shook his head and pressed his finger against Yuto's mouth. That shut Yuto up quickly. Then Kino continued to push the door, enough so that they could make out the words being spoken. 

"That hurt," a familiar voice grumbled. "I told you to go gentle, I don't want to wake up my friend." 

"Well that's your problem Wooseok, not mine," someone else replied back curtly. Yuto had never heard this voice before. It was more high pitched than Wooseok’s, and there was a slight accent to his speech as well.  "I'm almost done, I'll just put some bandages over them now. Are you sure you're okay?" These last words were spoken with a more gentle tone and a tinge of concern.

"Yeah, it was just a punch. I have to admit though, your boyfriend has got more power to him than what he looks," Wooseok scoffed. 

There was a short silence. "He's not my boyfriend anymore," the voice replied back, so quietly that Yuto almost didn't catch the words.

"Whatever, I'm not getting involved with you guys so you should let him know that we aren't dating." Wooseok sounded slightly distracted, and there was a sound of a light slap. "No, stop it. Not tonight."

"Why not? Can't I stay over?" the man whined. "Or don't you want to come over to mine?"

"No," Wooseok said firmly, and now there were noises of feet shuffling and the front door opening. "You should go back home tonight, I'm tired. Goodnight," he said, and the sounds of protest from the other man were cut off from the click of the door shutting. Yuto thought he could hear some inappropriate words being shouted outside but before he could make them out, Kino yanked his arm to pull him back inside the blankets. The sounds of footsteps climbing up the stairs got louder and louder until they reached the door of their room, which was still ajar. Both Kino and Yuto had the blanket over their head, so they were staring at each other with their breaths held as Wooseok whispered, "Yuto, are you awake?" 

Yuto had no idea why they were pretending to be asleep, but he just closed his eyes. After a couple of minutes, he heard the creak of Wooseok's bed and some tossing and turning before finally there was silence again. Yuto looked back at Kino, but within that time he had already fallen back to sleep. His mouth was slightly open, and he was so close to him that he could see his eyelashes flutter at each breath. Yuto wanted to kiss him right then, on his forehead, each eyelid, nose and finally mouth. God, the intensity of the craving was alarming. Yuto shut his eyes again, trying his best to ignore the tug at his heart, and slowly turned around so that his back would face Kino. The second time, it took him 653 countdowns until he finally fell asleep. 

The next morning, all that remained of Kino was a pile of neatly folded clothes and two plates of kimchi fried rice. _Thanks for last night,_ the note on the table read. 

"Did Kino stay over?" Wooseok mumbled as he sat down, yawning. 

"Yeah," Yuto said, still staring at the note. Kino usually had morning lectures on Mondays, so this was normal. However, he had never bothered to make them breakfast before. Thinking about the sincerity of Kino's gesture made Yuto feel as if he had a massive lump in his throat. 

"Well this is new, I've barely tried his cooking before. Which is probably a good thing." There was a clatter of cutlery as Wooseok started coughing violently. He was about to scold Wooseok about being ungrateful until he looked up and saw Wooseok properly for the first time that morning. 

"Wooseok! What's wrong with your face?" Yuto groaned, horrified. Wooseok's whole face had been used as a canvas. His left eye was a deep purple, swollen so profoundly that he could barely open it. There were red scratches on his cheeks and nose, although they didn't look deep. His lips weren't so lucky, as the right side had a cut with dried blood around it. Wooseok looked terrible, especially because his face was so pale. 

"It's nothing," Wooseok replied, picking up his spoon again and wincing at the taste of the rice. "Hey, I don't think this is edible."

"Stop avoiding the question," Yuto snapped. Wooseok glanced at him in surprise, a look of uncertainty washing over him. Normally, Yuto never got mad. That was always Wooseok's role in their friendship. Occasionally though, there were times where Yuto got pissed off. Like right now. "What happened to you?"

"Someone just punched me, alright?" Wooseok grumbled, avoiding Yuto's eyes. "It was just an accident."

"Uh, I don't think it's an accident when you've been hit on the face at least two times," Yuto pointed at his eye and lip. "Unless that person was very drunk. This person looks like they had pretty good aim though, they got you right in the eye."

"They _were_ drunk," Wooseok sighed, rubbing his head as if he had a headache. "And it was a mistake, they mistook me for someone else. Can we stop talking about it?"

"No," Yuto replied firmly. Normally he would let Wooseok off the hook, but he hadn't seen Wooseok's face in such a state before. He briefly remembered last night's events and asked, "weren't you with your mysterious friends? Didn't they try to help you?" 

"Yeah they did, they cleaned up my face and put some stuff on it. I just peeled off the bandages because it was annoying me while I slept. I'm fine Yuto, it seriously was an accident. But if you do feel sorry for me," Wooseok suddenly said sorrowfully, "I can't see well, as you can tell. Would you mind taking notes for me in class just this week? I'd rather not show my face in public until I look a bit better."

Yuto glared at him. Wooseok tried to blink innocently, then winced and covered his eye. "Fine," Yuto sighed. "But finish what Kino made, even if it doesn't taste good." Although Yuto instructed Wooseok to do so, he also had to force himself to eat the bright red rice. It was one of the spiciest dishes he’d ever tasted, but he managed with a couple of glasses of milk. Afterward, he brushed his teeth vigorously and quickly got ready for his own schedules that day.

It was 3 pm when he finished his last lecture. Mondays were always the hardest, and Yuto was yearning for a coffee desperately. Yawning, he picked up his belongings and had just left the room when someone tugged his wrist. He turned around and saw it was Kino. His eyes were still a little red, but he looked adorable in his baby pink hoodie and faded blue jeans. The look on his face, however, was serious. 

"Do you have time?" he asked. Yuto felt himself grow cold; did he know? By chance had he found out last night, while they had slept together? 

"Uh..." he stared at his watch, trying to conjure up some kind of lie.  

"It'll be quick," Kino told him, practically dragging him until they were in an isolated corner of the university cafeteria. He leaned into him so that he could say his next words in a quiet tone. 

"It's about Wooseok," Kino whispered, and Yuto felt himself relax for a moment. "Someone, who I've never seen before, approached me after class and asked if I was Wooseok's friend. He was really tall too, almost the same height at Wooseok. He asked if I knew whether he was on campus today and when I told him I didn't know, he just walked away. Who do you think he was?“

"I honestly don't know. However, I hope he isn't in some trouble," Yuto said. He quickly de-briefed Kino about the morning's events. When he was finished, Kino looked shocked, his hands covering his mouth. "I asked him about it, but he said it was just an accident and wouldn't discuss it any further. You don't think... he’s in some kind of gang, do you?“

Kino widened his eyes. ”Wooseok? … Possible, but probably not. I don’t think he would bother to get into something like that. Also, the guy who visited me today didn't look dangerous, I mean he was wearing a shirt with a bunny on it… also, he had light purple hair... but you never know. We should try talking to him about it, I feel like he's hiding stuff from us these days. Don't you?"

Yuto was going to agree, but he stopped. While Wooseok was somewhat secretive lately, he didn't feel like he had any right to judge him. After all, Yuto had his own secrets which he was hiding from Wooseok and Kino. Even Kino appeared to have certain things he didn’t want to discuss with them. It seemed like his once simple friends were a little more complex than he'd realised. “Maybe. I think for now we should just keep an eye on him and make sure that he’s safe. He’s not coming to class for a week, so maybe you can come over when you have time…” Only towards the end of his sentence did he realise what he was doing: inviting Kino over habitually. Sure, if things were like usual then it wouldn't have mattered. But things had changed, his _feelings_ for Kino weren't innocent anymore. Even if he wanted their friendship to continue like normal, he should be keeping some boundaries for now. He couldn't trust himself, couldn't tell whether his motives were pure or not. Wasn't he inviting Kino over too much these days? Did Kino think he was being strange? But Kino just smiled warmly, and then Yuto remembered that he wasn’t suspicious because these were things that Yuto and Kino always did.  Because they were good friends. Of course. 

“Sounds good. Just like usual?”

“Yeah, like usual.” Yuto was the one who told himself that he wanted to stay friends with Kino. Why was it so hard then? Why did he feel like he was suffocating as he stared at Kino's smile? At that moment, he felt someone slide their arm around his neck. 

“Hey, funny to see you guys here. What are you guys doing here?” Hongseok flashed a smile at them. He was dressed more casually today, wearing a plain white shirt and jeans. However, the shirt fitted him incredibly well, showing off his well-defined muscles and form. Standing next to him, Yuto was self-conscious of his own lean figure and tried to shift away from him casually. Hongseok just tightened his grip on Yuto and even put his hand around his waist. 

“Oh hi, Hongseok,” Kino grinned. For a second, Yuto thought he saw his eyes flicker from Hongseok to Yuto, but they were back on Hongseok in a flash. “We were just talking about something. What’s up?”

“Oh, I just saw you guys while I was grabbing lunch and thought I would say hi. But actually, could I talk to Yuto about something quickly? If that’s alright with you, Kino.”

“No that’s okay! I’ll talk to you later, Yuto?” Kino waved and then quickly turned around, walking out of the cafeteria. As soon as he did, Hongseok dropped the arm that was around Yuto and took a step back, staring intently at Kino. 

“Well? What did you want to talk about?” Yuto asked. He was half relieved and disappointed that he didn’t get the opportunity to ask Kino if he wanted to walk home together. It was probably better not to, especially when he felt so strange right now. Still, he could help feel a little wistful.

Hongseok pursed his lips, then shook his head. “Nothing really.”

“What? Then why did you bring me out?” Yuto was bewildered. Damn, he wondered if Kino was still nearby. Maybe he could catch him if Hongseok had nothing to say.

“I don’t know. I forgot. Oh yeah, are you okay? You looked really tensed when I was approaching you.” Hongseok pulled a tight-lipped expression, which he guessed was an imitation of him. 

"Yeah, I'm fine. I guess I just really need a coffee break," Yuto chuckled.

“Well remember my offer, you can contact me if you want to talk to someone. Wait, I actually do have something to ask you. Jinho is holding a casual party at his flat this weekend. Do you want to come over?”

Yuto pondered over the offer. The last party he attended was when he just started university and still an inexperienced drinker. So, he didn’t know about his drinking habits until the day after the party. Thank goodness Wooseok had been there with him, or else he would have started jumping on the tables to dance or worse, followed a stranger into the bedroom. The day after the party, Wooseok had teased him about his almost-hookup but he was grateful that he’d been there to stop him. “Thanks, but I don’t really like parties.”

"Actually that wasn't an offer. It was an order," Hongseok grinned, crossing his arms. "You owe me a favour, remember? Since I covered you last time, about doing a project. So I want you to repay me by coming to this party."

"I don't see how it will be helping you if I come," Yuto mumbled. "I'm not really any fun at parties."

"Well then I'll teach you. Come on, you should enjoy yourself more. It will be fun, Jinho will love to have you come and he throws really good parties. You might even meet someone new at the party." 

Yuto still shook his head. 

“Then, what if I told you that I might know who this mysterious purple haired person is?" At this information, Yuto stiffened and looked at Hongseok in surprise. "I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation with Kino. Jinho has a flatmate who fits that description, and he’ll probably be at the party too. If you come, you can talk to him and find out who he is, how he's connected to your other friend.”

Yuto hesitated. "Are you sure it's the same person?"

“Well I don't know anyone else who has purple hair and wears a bunny shirt. There's a high possibility that it's the right person. So what are you going to do?” Hongseok smirked, watching Yuto. 

Yuto still didn’t really want to go, but he did owe Hongseok a favour. Also, maybe he’d be able to speak to the mysterious person and find out more information about the damage on Wooseok's face. However, Yuto couldn’t trust himself to be at a party alone. So he asked, “Well... Can I bring Kino?”

Hongseok smiled mischeviously. “I'm sure Jinho would be fine with that. Actually, it would probably be better if you did. The more, the merrier right?”


End file.
